Close your eyes,
don't look around,
as your world falls down.
Close your eyes,
just listen to my voice,
its not like you have a choice.
Close your eyes,
and come with me now,
then we'll fade not knowing how.
Close your eyes,
smile your dead,
be happy since it was life you fread.
eh not so much
Comments
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"then we'll fade not knowing how." -- I really like that line.
Otherwise, heh. It's a mediocre poem that could use a bit of cleaning up in terms of grammar and rhythm, but it's not that bad.
"its not like you have a choice" -- It's.
"smile your dead" -- Smile, you're dead.
"be happy since it was life you fread" -- Fred? Freed? Frayed? What is "fread"?
--Cristina -
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i truthfully do not care about spelling or grammer errors
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That's lovely.
They just detract from your writing and make you appear uneducated, but whatever. -
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well i truthfully do not have time to worry about it
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omg i luffles this its really good!
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lol ty
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not a problem im here to serve ,to read,and most importantly, to tell you how awesome YOU are! = )
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