Inspiration:
Your eyes are a reflection of your soul: Beautiful Intimidation
Oh, God I want to kiss you, hard on the lips,
You have no Idea, how my heart trips
When Your eyes find mine
and I can't find
a reason to ever leave you,
to feel your hands on my face,
a never ending embrace
of two minds, two hearts entwined,
you mess up my mind,
and I've found my soul in you
This poem (v) is a less cliched elaboration of that( ^ ) poem.
Like greeting a childhood friend
after years of separation;
That's what I felt
the first time I ever saw you
enraptured, motionless , 7 rows back
watching your every movement,
your lips eloquent dance of speech
and all the while awed,
that I could've gone so long
without knowing you
while still knowing you
all along
See, I knew you well before
we'd said hello
Well before you knew there
was a me to say hello to,
and since I met you through a
two way mirror, It's safe
to say I've known you longest.
And knowing you came with
every symptom of infatuation,
including a few I swear
you invented yourself,
You've got me
Choking back urges to
take your rosy cheeks
in my hands and kiss you,
hard
though you barely knew my name,
unable to mask
the undertones of raw
desire from my face,
from my eyes,
as I commit every inch
of your smoldering perfection
to memory,
to my heart.
But it went beyond that,
the feeling that I've
always known you,
that I'm not meeting a new person,
simply re-educating myself on
one I've known my whole life,
never wavered,
And though you've left,
Breaking hearts with only smiles,
from your crooked little lips,
and eye to eye with your deep
Blue oceans of innocence;
Oh how I feel for those
who you'll enrapture next
Someday you'll return, or I'll
pass you on the street,
and I'll recognize you as I did
that first night 7 rows back.
And this, is where it ends
for now.
Author notes
What can I add b/w "Who you'll enrapture next" and "Someday you'll return, or I'll"
B/c it doesn't seem to flow well. Please tell me what you think of the rest. I have painstakingly edited this one. And parts really were painful to think about.
A contest entry
- GET NOTICED!!!! by Nighttime angel.
625 points, ended January 13, 2008, 88 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Got A Crush On A Pretty Pistol [[+Round One+]] by brittany.geeze.
360 points, ended January 23, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I really like this poem, I found that I could relate to many parts of this. you did an excellent job on this, you should be proud of yourself. I think that all of us at one time or another have been through this, you did a great job describing it. you have a great talent for writing.
good luck in the contest.
kat
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Wow i really like this poem. I can definetly relate I just recently got over a similar experience about this guy i was infatuated with. At first i was slightly intimidated by the length of the poem but once i started reading it i was amazed at how smoothly it went and the next thing i knew i was reading the last lines, it just rolled of the tongue that well. Once again great job!!!
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Great work!
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Awww, it's sweet and I get this image of a kid at a class meeting, crushing on the girl giving a speech. It's adorible! love it, nice work!
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i think you did an awesome job i can really picture it all in my head and i loved the ending. Good work.
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