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touching centre-flesh

petals balance lightly -
           arm-stems guiding
           touch, unfurling
           reach to seek
           some glow,

peeling folding lines
from flower-faced
palms,
to trace beyond
that ground

for wrinkles
within centre-flesh
to gather shards of bright -

spun upon horizons
but a step away,

                               [ to blend a demarcated self
                                                & read a future framed where flowers meet ]


 

 

 

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think (Critical Honesty Appreciated)

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments


  • Rowan gold member
    September 27, 2007

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    I missed this one..
    excellent use of the prompt.
    Congrats. on HM!


  • Nicolette gold member
    September 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I love the flower-metaphor here, the petals and the "arm-stems".. the unfurling of touch by the flower of the hand. The last two lines are amazing...loved the "read a future framed where flowers meet) - lovely touch of alliteration too. Beautiful, well-crafted and presented poetry. Thank you for this entry.

    ~ Nicolette


  • astralshepherd gold member
    September 17, 2007

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    There is something so utterly sensual about the hand, the miracle of touch and the way it can drive us to madness – the surrendered insanities of pleasure on one side and the terrifying helplessness in the parting caress There is a gracefulness most will miss, concealed within the line, exposed by better understanding this brilliant author. Time spent here, in this poem, is like bathing rose petals; so completely feminine and alluring. I think your poem, by far exceeds all requirements of the contest and leaves others in the dust. A poem made of pure gold.

    blessings and best wishes

    ~richard

  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    September 17, 2007

    Edit | Reply


    Poetry like this is why I love women.