Lately,
when I look at my wrist
I see my artery
pulsate
like a pale worm
and I wonder
would it wriggle away
from a knife
or would it
sigh in anticipation
of the inescapable
home-coming
and savour
the damp taste
of earth
covering me
later or sooner,
inevitably
if not today
(tomorrow).
A contest entry
- suicide poems that don't suck by aeolia.
380 points, ended January 1, 2008, 104 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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This is what 'dark' poetry should be. I love the images you present, especially the "pale worm."
I'm sorry, I can't really think of anything intelligent to say at this time.
Amazing work nonetheless!
--Cristina -
thought provoking.....well done
i really like this poem..this genre has always been fascinating for me..comptemplating one's own mortality ..questioning what is beyond..and what role in society do we play...
i relate to the pain and suffering these poems portray..mostly not with the question of suicide but the reasons why we turn on ourselves...and how we may overcome the struggle..
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Good dark poem
This is good. Angst/suicide poems are hard to do well, but I like the offset of "tomorrow" and the image of the vein as a worm. Keep up the good work.
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oh now this I do not like! Not so much how you wrote it cause it is well written but the content and the thoughts it provokes. Nothing/no one is worth such a fate and all iit means, as far as I think, is a lesson to be repeatted another time, I love you honey
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