Fingers stretched,
metallic
cold to swirl a marshmallow cloud tumultuous.
Heaven beckoned steel beast.
Persuasion pushed pantomime
from sullen lips,
kneading metals quibbled in molten rivers,
tumbling dirty grime from miner's caps.
Night shadows
glistened windowed moon beneath a park
marked employees only.
And still...
star twinkle opened heaven's door.
Copyright © 2007
Pamela A. Lamppa
(All Rights Reserved)
In a list
A contest entry
- pif - building by Melissa Gayle.
500 points, ended September 19, 2007, 5 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Excellent imagery. There is almost a darker feel to it, but I really love it.

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Melissa Whispered
Thank you for your kind words. I appreciate them very much.
GREAT contest. Pamela
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Atmospheric
A thought-provoking and imposing representation of a powerful picture. Loved the sound of the sentence beginning 'Persuasion pushed pantomime...' although I amgoing to need you to help me understand it!
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Dean
Thank you so much. I am pleased for your comments here. ~Pamela
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Pam,
Wow, this is totally awesome and so vivid with imagery. We are all employees of life and though we may not be machines in the true sense of the word we are sometimes forced to act like one. This was deep and filled with strong emotion. You bring free verse to a new level with your elegant verbiage and I can never thank you enough for the magic you share with all of us through your gift. Checking all my parts now to see if they need oiling.
Best wishes in the contest with this masterpiece. Love you my friend, Joyce


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Joyce
Thank you so much for your always encouraging and positive comments. I appreciate them so much. ~Pamela
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1 - 6 of 6




