What I do NOT Wear in Summertime.
(a NON-ENTRY.)
For a start I NEVER wear a bra,
(though I know some blokes that do)
but I think that’s going a bit too far
if you’ve got no boobs! Don’t you?
And I DON'T wear knickers - I prefer
me boxer shorts instead
and, just to look me best for her,
I wear ‘em when in bed.
I put a fresh pair on each day;
they help support me knackers
and keep the bloody flies away
'coz fly-blow drives yer crackers.
So there ya go yer nosey lot!
That’s what I’ll wear an’ what I’ll not!
Hugh (R.) September 16th. 2007
Author notes
None except HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANGELICA!
In a list
A contest entry
- This CONTEST # 21 IS ONLY OPEN FOR HUGH WYLES FAVORITES. by huguenauties.
750 points, ended September 28, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Dearest Uncle Hugh,
I always wondered what you looked like from the back on, almost as handsome as your front. Wonderful poem, appeals to my sense of humor! Love you.
Hugs and love,
Petratani x
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That's telling us! Whose big idea was it anyway - oh, she who must be obeyed...
This is a cute poem, Hugh, thanks for the smiles. 
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hmmm. so who's the stud muffin in the pic? anyone you know? i wouldnt mind wearing him lol.
great entry. boxers are quite comfy lol
loves ya in piling pools
Til
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Dear Hugh,
I should HOPE you wouldn't wear a bra!! That would be kinda kinky
I think you'd look kinda cute in knicker's though!
HAHA! Oh no please don't let them get FLYBLOWN! EWWWWW the smell and maggots would be awful, Edna would make you sleep outside! HAHAHAHA
Love your poem my dear friend.
Pity it's not an entry.
Love Jen.
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oh my gawd...
fly blown...never heard of such an abomination...keep those boxers clean and closed for bloody sakes...poor Edna...
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Dear Hugh,
I enjoyed your 'revelation' (even though I didn't ask for it).
Love and Hugs,
Maureen
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Good grief, Hugh...I didn't think ANYTHING could make me smile today, but I'm happy to say this almost had me laughing out loud!
And boxers??? Oh...I LOVE a man in boxers! Suddenly I'm also very grateful we don't have any kind of flies that nest in such sensitive areas here where I live. 
A wonderful entry, and thank you SO MUCH for the smile.
Love and
s,
~J.
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Dear Babe, It's just as well you don't wear Bras and knicker's, I don't think Edna would appreciate that one little bit!
OHH and I can relate to the flyblown knacker's, it happened to my Grampa out on the farm in Australia while he was shearing sheep, they got into his grundies and made an awful mess of them, had to go to the quacks to get treatment. Granma said he was never the same after that! Just couldn't get it UP!
Love your poem Babe, I always do.
Love Hine.
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"Nosey" lol, funny because I had a poem written for the contest based on the notion of the question being nosey...humor of course.
Is there a better rhyme than, "Knickers/Knackers?" I defy you to find one!
I've worn a bra, wearing one now but I guess that is no longer a secret after all the other admissions I've made.
Is "bloody" a word New Zealander's use? I thought that was just the English. I've used it on occasion but then again, I'm just not right.
Anyway, an enjoyable non entry, well, enjoyable no matter what kind of entry.
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Dear Sir Ima Q. Cumber,
Knickers = bickers, dickers, flickers, kickers, lickers, liquors, pickers, slickers, snickers, stickers, tickers, trickers, vicars, whickers, dominickers, politickers etc.
In New Zealand "bloody" is a frequently used alternative to the 'F-word' being used by some degenerates as almost every second word in a given sentence. Eg: "The bloody weather was so bloody awful I couldn't bloodywell get a bloody thing done all bloody day!"
It is also widely used in Australia - especially in pubs after rugby defeats by All-Blacks or cricket matches against 'bloody wogs!'.
Thanks for your kind comment. You are quite evidently a discerning reader!
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I'm bloody discerning!
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Where did you find that picture of me?
Couldn't help the curves go up in my mouth forming a smile as I read what you do and don't wear. Just clarified a few images I have of you now! Nice rhyme, good humour and a beautiful articulated poem to grab a morning snmile over coffee.
Gregg
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Eee gads, Hugh... you sure know how to wake a person up. As for the blowing.. wanna clarify that just a bit
This is so funny
Dee
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Dear Dee,
It is not an idle jest
when the Summer flies infest
if those brutes get up your shorts
and lay eggs in your 'resorts!'
If your privates get fly-blown
('speshly when they're fully grown)
you need more than a feather duster
to clear your crawling cluster!
One poor chap I know who tried
swabbing with formaldehyde
got his parts in sorry state
as they would not operate.
So I hope you'll heed my warning:
Spray with MORTEIN every morning!
Love and hugs, XXX Hugh (R.)
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HAHAHAHA
Good one Hugh,
HAHA I don't blame you for not wearing a bra, though some men should coz they're bigger than females.
You definitely must never let them get flyblown! Oh dear me no, it would make an awful smell then the missus wouldn'nt let you near her.
Great poem dear friend, it gave me quite a giggle to wake up to.
Love Bea
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haha this is awesome and made me smile! thanks for brightning up my day =]
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