i.
swallowed thick
in silence
i stammer while
paper blinks
at the whites of eyes
like a mirage
of lethal cursors
ii.
i pretend to write
furious love letters
to god or shakespeare
while really i think about
declaring war on the
white-walled rooms &
attacking the emptiness
with crayons
iii.
time spins itself
colourless daisy petals
who hang in the air
like a single breath --
but we all land
six feet under earth
whether we are
alpha or omega
Author notes
An extension of three freewrites from earlier this evening. Yep, year eleven end-of-year exams start tomorrow, and I'm writing poetry instead of studying! ;D
xx
DancingRed.
In a list
A contest entry
- ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING!!!!! I SWEAR! by Cherokee.
300 points, ended September 23, 2007, 30 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite me! ~~ One day only ~~ 500 points to Gold, will be judged tomorrow. by Naridill.
625 points, ended September 28, 2007, 145 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
critique welcome.
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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I loved this, was simply stunning, the word play, the creative imagery and simply the style, it worked well together and added alot to itself.
Much luck -
I know I've commented on this but I don't see the comment. You know I love this poem. It is so creative and original. Really cool!
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Gorgouse.
peace to all ~flight
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i pretend to write
furious love letters
to god or shakespeare
while really i think about
declaring war on the
white-walled rooms &
attacking the emptiness
with crayons
wow---I so can relate to all of this! very well done!
great piece, portraying the thoughts of any stressed student! haha==i get distracted and write poetry when I should study as well....lolz
keep it up!
pegleg
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A person after my own heart, writing poetry instead of studying. And good poetry too. Great two poems about writer's block. I'll be honest, I'm not sure how the last one relates to the first two, but I like them regardless.
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argh exams...
good thing our midterms are over and done... just have to wait for the final JUDGEMENT then. Lolz. forget the exams? probably... cause you're already producing such great poems... so yeah Forget it... I'll bet you don't even have to study anymore... hmm smart one you are!
anywayz...
Cheers
-Blanche
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sadly even the greatest poetry has NO place in a maths exam.
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HOW TRUE!!!
no wonder I'm getting those grades in math...
but I already know that for I truly suck at that subject.
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i would rather sit here and read through all your poems than unearth my maths book. i'd choose metaphors over parabolas any time.
i know i should study, but i can't bring myself to find a pen. when i go poorly it will be all my fault. i suppose i should have established some study patterns now, so when the HSC comes its not such an overwhelming shock.
but still, words make more sense than numbers.
(and though mr duncan thinks otherwise, i find words to be much more beautiful!)
endless love to you on this fine exam day,
tegen
x
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thank you endlessly for being my bright spark of sunshine today.
i don't think i'm going to get much maths done today either; the poetry and the music is too inviting.
err well, only year eleven, right?
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Forget about studying, lol, you're writing brilliance.
I do this all of the time.. my mind is just always in poetry mode, even when I am grounded from AP.
Ha... [hence the fact that I'm logged in right now] -
My favorite is stanza number two, although I think they're all really great.
"i pretend to write
furious love letters
to god or shakespeare" is my favorite of the poem.
And "time spins itself
colourless daisy petals
who [i think you mean THAT not WHO?] hang in the air
like a single breath --
but we all land
six feet under earth
whether we are
alpha or omega" that third stanza is my 2nd favorite, although hard to choose!
Keep writing, you're so good at it!
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Amazing... but tsk tsk... er... let me just come to the "yum yum" imagery. You did it again hun.
Study? Oh that is a word right? No, seriously, good luck
-Esha
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Much love to you.
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