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I Love the Fall

Missing image

I Love the Fall


I loved this season, since I was a child
The slate grey skies that are beguiled
The painted leaves, one more reason
Since I was a child, I loved this season

Silent emotion and a soft flowing breeze
The rustle of branches high in the trees
Twisted thoughts of your fake devotion
A soft flowing breeze and silent emotion

I want you to die, I want you to hurt
An intimate lie, you thought you could skirt
Caught with that woman, I don’t know why
I want you to hurt, I want you to die

I’ll hide your soul, ‘neath a blanket of leaves
The beauty of autumn is death that deceives
The threads of my mind are dark as coal
‘Neath a blanket of leaves, I’ll hide your soul

I love the fall, it’s not overrated
Dark as my mind which I keep sedated
On frozen ground, I’ll watch you crawl
It’s not overrated, I love the fall

 

 

 

Author notes

Swap Quatrain:

Each stanza in the poem must be a quatrain (four lines) where the first line is reversed in the fourth line. In addition, line 2 must rhyme with line 1, and line 3 must rhyme with line 4 and so on, BUT not repeat the same rhyming pattern on subsequent stanzas.
Rhyming pattern: AABB, CCDD, and so on.
The Swap Quatrain was created by Lorraine M. Kanter.

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14
  • silver-girl
    October 19

    Edit | Reply
    Very pretty!! Your use of the swap quatrain is very good!! I've started using that style of writing myself & I've found it to be very difficult, yet very pretty when it all comes together!! Thank you for sharing this with me, with all of us!!


  • DesolatELifE
    January 31, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    i've never read a 'swap quatrain' before, that I know of, which is a shame, because this provese that I do like that structure.

    I think this is a terrific poem, and so on and so forth, with lots of compliments to you for writing it
    good luck


  • Never Fall in Love
    January 30, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    My point is proven here once again. This is so brilliant - I love how this flows off the tongue exceptionally and is so ... I dont even have a word for it! You tempt me to try this - not many forms do that

    I think your ending was brilliant! It has the punch that lets the reader remember this one poem for, well, forever.

    Never ♥


  • artis
    November 6, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    When love leaves one's lonely limbs, stark against the cold night, all colors drained to the feet, the blush of passion

    just a memory, as cruel winds of fate blow away the summers of delight,and leave a cold blanket to cover one's grief. I have known such heated angst as this over love lost, I have a graveyard in my mind where I bury former loves, I wander there sometimes to kick dirt on their mounds, once split so delightfully, now decayed into regrets. superb work Amera,~~Artis


  • micol
    September 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Good work with the word bank. It makes the poem take intriguing twists, buffered by the smoothness of the form. The combination works well.


    • Amera gold member
      September 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks so much Michael. I saw you entered this contest too, I can't believe I beat my teacher. Thanks for letting me win.


  • I Am Gun
    September 20, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my god! So I just found number one *does number one dance* I utterly loved this poem and you totally scored brownie points for making it about autumn and death, wow i am amazed i have never had a person so perfectly capture what i wanted in a poem awsome job
    chrissy


    • Amera gold member
      September 20, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, it was a challenge.


  • Desire gold member
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Holy Moly!!

    Wow! and Double Wow!


    What a Powerful piece You have penned~
    Love the story You told and the rhyme...
    Magnificent...
    the last line just gave me chills
    for some reason
    In a good poetic way

    Love this Form Queen!
    Thank You for sharing this

    Many blessings to You in the contest
    Best wishes too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • Swan song gold member
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I liked this one you crooned it so perfectly. You have no clue how I would love to hear you read this poem.
    I bet it would be even more beautiful if you graced it with your voice.


  • ellipsist
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    beautiful... and I second

    that!

    very well written... you've certainly captured all of the things that I love abut Fall...

    wonderful!


  • Marctheman
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    great write, this is a powerful piece, and i am a lover of the fall seasons. good luck in the contest.


  • PerVirtuous
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The Fall is easy to take, it's the getting back up that is difficult. Seriously, this is a beautiful piece. I love how you incorporate personal metaphors into nature. Such passion! Mmmmm. I love passion. And your ability to take off your sundress and put on the leather skirt and kneehigh boots for these dark writes is uncanny. You look delightful wearing either. I have to take a shower now. Three bunnies.


  • HaleyMary
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Powerful write, very dark and seemed to tell a story. Had lots of emotion in this piece, too. Like, a feeling of anger and wanting whoever hurt you to feel that hurt eventually in the future. Good luck in the contest.

1 - 14 of 14