If I never met you...

On that July afternoon,
A day barely visible in my memory,
You walked into my life,
Into a place in my heart,
That you have never left.

But what if I never went on that trip,
(Because it was just by chance I did.)
What if I never went on that walk,
(Because I did not even want to.)
What if something (anything) was different
And I never met you?...

My life would continue in the same mundane
Step-by-step existence that it had in the sixteen years prior.
My phone lines would lie dormant
And my texting bill would not exist.
Instead of my phone holding my long lost twin of a friend,
And placing a smile on my lips upon hearing your ringtone, as it does now
I would actually sleep during the nights.

If I never met you my deepest secrets would be locked inside
Still threatening to overtake me at every given moment.
No one else knows of my little green men, except you.
But what if you were not there, who would I have told?
What if I had told her instead?
Would she have betrayed me?
Probably.
Instead of reconnecting with the good in the world,
I would have been worse off; hurt beyond reach
Without you to catch me, direct and guide me.

You complete the missing pieces of my thoughts
And whole-heartedly understand what is going on
Within the intricate workings of my mind
Even when I don’t understand half of it myself.

If I never met you I would still be lost
Fighting for a foothold in my ever-spinning teenage world.
If I never me you I would not be who I am today,
So I am glad I did.