Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Key to the Kingdom

Missing image

Key to the Kingdom

The labyrinth leads to the mystical rose
Within her petals you will find the key
She’ll be harder to find than you suppose
My crown shall be yours, should you agree

Within her petals you will find the key
The journey is treacherous, few return
My crown shall be yours, should you agree
Stray off the path and you will surely burn

The journey is treacherous, few return
Her thorns are poison, so hear me well
Stray off the path and you will surely burn
The kingdom is yours should you excel

Her thorns are poison, so hear me well
She’ll be harder to find than you suppose
The kingdom is yours should you excel
The labyrinth leads to the mystical rose

 

 

 

Author notes

Author name: Amera

Required poem link:  Rose for all Seasons

Photo by: Entish

 

Pantoum Poetry
The pantoum consists of a series of quatrains rhyming ABAB in which the second and fourth lines of a quatrain recur as the first and third lines in the succeeding quatrain; each quatrain introduces a new second rhyme as BCBC, CDCD. The first line of the series recurs as the last line of the closing quatrain, and third line of the poem recurs as the second line of the closing quatrain, rhyming ZAZA.

The design is simple:

Line 1
Line 2
Line 3
Line 4

Line 5 (repeat of line 2)
Line 6
Line 7 (repeat of line 4)
Line 8

Continue with as many stanzas as you wish, but the ending stanza then repeats the second and fourth lines of the previous stanza (as its first and third lines), and also repeats the third line of the first stanza, as its second line, and the first line of the first stanza as its fourth. So the first line of the poem is also the last.

Last stanza:

Line 2 of previous stanza
Line 3 of first stanza
Line 4 of previous stanza
Line 1 of first stanza

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • Sai Babas Lotus
    September 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    You are one of my favourite poetess here!

    Very interesting poem with beautiful imagery. The form is perfectly followed to the T and your word choice is awesome. Congrats on the Gold!

    Charishma


    • Amera gold member
      September 30, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      What a beautiful thing to say; thank you.

  • kendhal22
    September 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    this is a beautiful form u crafted here. I love it. Kendhal22


  • myorama
    September 24, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    An excellently crafted phantoum with a sense of mystery. Good luck in the contest.


  • Jalalbad gold member
    September 19, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    beautiful poem.

    You are a good writer for one so young!
    Smile,
    Judy


  • ellipsist
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    where do you find these pictures?

    I love these fantastical tales that you weave in these forms... always entertaining at the very least...


  • Desire gold member
    September 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Wow!!

    I so Love this
    Magnificent Pantoum and this one grabbed me hard
    for some reason~Oy!!
    The picture entranced me and then Your words
    hypnotized me~

    Thank You for sharing this Form Queen


    Best wishes to You in the contest!
    Many blessings too
    and much love~ Desire~*~


  • Cup-a-Joe
    September 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Prettiest Pantoum Poetry Possiable!!!


  • amaranthine lover gold member
    September 14, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    this is an absolutely beautiful piece amera!!! vertainly quite a read!


  • Denierim
    September 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I simply love the atmosphere in this piece. Filled with mystery and something that can't really be named. I love the story you hid along the words and the words themselves were selected with great taste. The flow is perfect from the beginning to the end and show visions of this story to the reader. I don't even know if I have a bad thing to say about this...

    In all honesty, this is one of the best (at least one of my favorite) Pantoums I've read in all this time. Wonderful work!

    • Amera gold member
      September 14, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, what a wonderful comment. It’s an honor for a poet to have someone read her work and see the message intended.

      Love,
      Amera♥


  • jo-el
    September 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    very nicely done. went well with the picture prompt. i also like this style in particular with the sort of lines you've crafted here. its almost like a caption to some enchanted map or somethin or perhaps even instructions from a fairy guide of sorts. the tone when i read it was totally adult and serius and almost dark. and yet after a second read or 3 i could see the pliability this write offers. while the message seems doused with a bit of sensuality, it is provided with such subtlety that i'm sure you've already recognized its commerciall value as well. the repeated lines have such an entrancin quality, i'm confident that this is the sort of thing that could be transformed into a very catchy tune with the right music. children would love this just as much as the adults on this site. books, movies, pixar/ animation. you may wanna consider it. you have a knack for usin these forms and drawin out their full potential. which this one seems to have a riddle like quality to it...i guess that's the way you worked these lines out. can't really say that all examples of this form have the same quality..but i have recognized the quality demonstrated in a variety of complex forms that you use. with the right connection they could find a much broader audience. anyways...excellent write

    • Amera gold member
      September 14, 2007

      Edit | Reply
      Wow! Thank you so much! You really read my work and got everything I tried to do out of it. What a wonderful comment.

      Love,
      Amera♥


  • PerVirtuous
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I think this is wonderful. A mystery... the form is perfect for such a mystery. I love the way the poem resembles a labyrinth. Perfect to convey the thought.


  • captain howdy
    September 13, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Very lovely in form! Very lovely in language!


  • Faeryn
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Awesome!! love the pic too; it goes well with your poem. this is such a great pantoum, one of the best that I've read. I really love the first line and the way you used it as the last is super cool!
    -Tay-


  • HaleyMary
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful write and wonderful form and flow. The poem made me think of how it can take time to win a person's heart and how the time it takes to win a heart can be like taking twists and turns in life like going through a maze or labyrinth. Good luck in the contest.


  • JohnnyD gold member
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Rune stones, very nicely done, most so, and OHHH, how I can relate to this stanza!

    Within her petals you will find the key
    The journey is treacherous, few return
    My crown shall be yours, should you agree
    Stray off the path and you will surely burn

    my key to the kingdom is to awaken to lips and eyes that are mine alone. Easy to say, difficult to obtain, but I have faith, I have a lot of faith.



    Dad

1 - 19 of 19