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Whether you like it or not... (the original and the make-over )

Missing image
She is ours, whether you like it
or not… and 15 years
I raised her
mostly alone…
into the loving young women
she is today

Where I tried to let her see
life has so many way’s
to walk, together…
sometimes alone, but always
having us,
family and friends too
showing love
and really care…

Sometimes making decisions
not wanting it to turn out bad
but always believing
in the goodness, love

And she is trying so hard
to follow every thought
discovering it all,
in love now, herself…

Are you feeling replaced?
Do you really think she hates you?
Did you ever tried to ask her why
she believes in love?
This young woman,
our daughter
so in love with life, with him…

You’re pushing her away
neglecting her boyfriend
Denying she loves him,
because she has hope
and love inside
for him the most…of course
he is her future,
while we,
as years fade,
become her past…

Don’t you see?
She doesn’t want to choose…
Not between him, or us…
But you force her
with your anger…

------------------



You’re such an asshole
and I guess blind too
Whether you like it or not
He is her world
Everything she needs
for now, because she is in love
with him…
She needs your support
Now maybe more than ever
But you’re just too stupid to see

Or is it your selfish nature?
Just want her to follow your rules
because you’re the best,
and know everything so well?

Well let me tell you…
You’re an asshole!!
Someday soon she will be gone
Maybe not her body itself
but her soul for sure

Than you might realise
what you have done
Because nothing hurt so bad
than losing your own daughter








Author notes

I tried to do the best I could.....to all...

In a list

A contest entry

Whether you like it or not...

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • hobo-candy
    September 23, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    i love this its amazing and no its didnt offend me at all..i completly understand...


  • Sarah957
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Very poinient. Sometimes it doesnt matter whether you like a choice someone you love makes or not, because you love them, you deal with it.


  • Vernal Bloom
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Ah I remember this lovely poem and I’m sure no one else can reply as well as you did. There is a strange thing about this poem and I guess it’s because it came out from your heart and that is why it goes to the hearts. I feel you felt such situation. Did I expressed myself, at last?
    I thank you kindly for sharing this with us and wish you best of luck in the contest

    ~Massy~
    PS. Again lovely picture

  • Warrior7
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Excellent piece Jeannette, i must say that i like the original more than the revised one it's seems to have more feeling of not wanting your daughter to lose both her mother and father, the revised one is more about him and how much of an asshole he is. I hope that all made sense. Great work and i hope that stupid ex husband of yours comes to his senses.

  • Sunbreathes...ra
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    again just another view into the wonderful and strong woman that you are Jeannette... you make me so proud of you, so proud to be your friend... I am sure that your daughter is beautiful and is just as strong as you are.

    I hope that her father will open his heart and recognize how impotant this time is in a young womans life. she deserves happiness and he should be man enough, and even more importantly selfless enough to allow her the opportunity to be happy.

    she is lucky to have you in her life. keep your head up girl, you are number one in my book.


  • AddictiveTRUTH
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Still awesome

    I enjoyed both versions. I know I loved the first, but now I them both...so I chose both, yeah...

    Great job!

    Piffy


  • Heavens Child
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    What an amazing pint of view, as a parent. It's a beautiful thing that you can relate to your daughter and stand up for her the way you have. Just brilliantly written. Best wishes in the contest.


  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You tell him girl!!! GGrr men think they know it all!! But at least she has a wonderful and understanding mom like you! I hope this turns out okay. Awesome write hun. Good luck in the contest.

    Jeannie


  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    you did this AWESOME twinny!!!!
    Great job best of luck in the contest!!!
    so powerful!

    Tasha


  • catz Moderators member
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow, this is superb. First the pleading, reasoning, trying to get the father to understand... then the revision... telling it like you see it... an asshole.

    An excellent revision.

    Thank you for entering it in the contest and good luck

    Dee

1 - 10 of 10