Oh God
I shall not pretend that
You take time off each week
as we take every Sunday...
but somehow I think that
you do take casual leave sometimes
leaving me unwatched
this I feel when
I am tempted for the next sin
Oh God..
A contest entry
- Quote Inspired, bon apetit! by vampire of thought.
750 points, ended September 30, 2007, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Picture Prompt by Freestyle Bushido.
450 points, ended October 31, 2007, 9 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prompt Contest # 2. by Poetryintheblood.
450 points, ended November 4, 2007, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
-
Thank you for your entry, Josephine
-
intresting philosophy you written here, thank you for entering.
-
congrats
-
This is a very interesting picture to put to these words. Who is the sinner? The child or the soldier? Both? Its a very topical area right now, with the situation in Iraq etc.
The poem raises questions in my mind about responsibility. Feeling tempted when God is apparently not watching puts al of the responsibility on the person feeling temped - what will they do and who will take the blame? God? because he was not there?
Perhaps this feeling of temptation, of God not being present, is what Christians mean when they say they are being tested.
I am an athiest, so it is hard for me to really understand all of these facets of faith. But this clearly worded poem made me think.
Thank you Prabhu.
LB
x
-
Interesting philosophy...
its a unique thought that I haven't heard before. I mean, i've heard those, "Did God take a day off" ones before, but the way this is worded, adn the picture you included....
It hit me.
Nicely done, and interesting read.
Thanks for the entry and good luck!
~Vo -
Tempted to the next sin...Wonderful title and great pic. Good luck in yoru contest. ~Sie
-
Powerful image of the "Sunday Christian" in these words...we take one day off from our own willful life and visit God...but does he take a day off from being present to us?...hmmm...much to ponder with that...I do like the ending very much..."this I feel when I am tempted for the next sin Oh God..."...almost seems to suggest the sin is a foregone action...perhaps rightly so...this is being human...Lovely poem and though brief, when combined with this poignant image of innocence and war...it is like an onion-so many layers of meaning...Good luck in the contest. Peace, Rhonda
Adding your comment:
1 - 7 of 7
