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While Eating Ramen

Took a bite of ramen
and was burned by the juice
It took five minutes to heal
Because I was so obtuse

I wondered "why just five?"
Which lead me to the question
Of "what is time, really?"
I was open for a suggestion

I stared at my clock
I stared at my phone
I stared at my ramen
As I was all alone

But then I realized
The answer was disguised

Time is simply the life you live
In between the infinitismal changes
And what I wouldn't simply give
For a new bowl of cooler ramen

Author notes

I guess this is crap, but its my favorite crap, so no fluhshing it down the toilet.

Besides, this happened. I get the though, but its hard to explain it.

Like...a second is really the word for the space in between the event of blinking twice. A second is really the distance that little stick travels on the clock, right? That's how we understand its a second. But its really just a measure of change. That's all time is. Like our lifespan. The event of being a newborn from the event of old age. The measure of that is a lifespan (typically 70-80 years...) Okay, I'm ranting, sorry.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments


  • DancingRed
    September 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I think it’s amazing; poet’s have such beautiful thoughts about even the most obscure objects.

    “I stared at my clock
    I stared at my phone
    I stared at my ramen
    As I was all alone”

    -- I loved that stanza. It was so simply written, but extremely powerful in that.

    I’m not all that keen on end rhyme at the best of times, but perhaps you could try keeping the syllable counts the same in each line -- I find that helps with rhyme to keep the flow more even.

    But I did enjoy this piece, along with your musings in the author notes.

    DancingRed.


  • Shahrazad
    September 11, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    As somewhat silly and light-hearted as this poem was, it held a lot of good truths and I really really liked it! Your style of writing put a smile on my face as well as a pause in my thinking. I loved it!!! Good job. Thanks for entering it in the contest. Creative to use something such as food in a contest called "food for the famished mind" Applause for your title. (And btw- I love ramen... just had some yesterday)