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Heart Thief









I hear the roar of the sparrow.
How could I not?
Deep within my covers
my head covered up
listening to the howl of the wind
as if tomorrow did not matter anymore.

And you. Rash & impatient
spreading like a bed of flowers
just to catch my interest,
so I won't run away anymore.

and I flash like some giant electrode
on Tesla's Siberian plain,
you offer me red licorice
tell me of holy places
and when I believe
when I reach out, you yank it all away
again. And now, Now you ask me to bare my soul,
lie naked in your coral lashed to your chorale,
be your prickly bed
be something someone said,
afraid, but not completely dead;
to vomit on your shore,
be red, the sparrow's roar
while you climb from limb to limb
adore adore adore.
Lick my lips dry
of your sanctity
and clear my crusted eyes
while what's left of in-between
watches you walk away
staccato firebird on the beam,
like 35 milimeter dreams.

Author notes

Written September 23rd, 2003

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 32 of 32

  • cvillelisa
    September 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply



    Who this. That real estate girl?


    me looking for somethin.


  • Beating gold member
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    oh wow. I actually just automatically read this really slow, feeling every single word. It went so good with the picture and I love how the reader kind of gets the feeling of the mist in the morning. I don't know how else to put it. Love it!


  • JustBeingDevine
    July 13, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    This is really great. Terrific expression through words....Very Good!


  • grannyeri gold member
    July 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Great title for this piece - very creative write you have penned here - metaphoric and how nice to recyle this old poem. Do you still feel the same way 4 years later?


  • Wolfdog silver member
    February 1, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Excellant/intriguing/unique

    For whatever reasons, I seemed to find this a rather whimsical piece with serious overtones. I liked all of it just as it is. I thought your imagery was excellant and your choice of words quite appropiate throughout the entire poem.


  • MermaidSinging
    February 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    *sigh* You pull parts of the heart broken, the tempted, and arrange all those bruised pieces with such pretty sorrow. I ache with those goodbyes.

  • Lost Inside Myself
    June 25, 2006
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    this is soooooo good, great write!


  • November 15, 2004
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    This was amazing. I am at a loss of words here. Wonderful write. I will look forward to reading more of your work. Jody


  • duana
    September 6, 2004
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    I am so numb that I can't get into such intense emtional poems these days....udually I love them. But I think this is well written.


  • whatsinaname silver member
    November 23, 2003
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    Amazingly vivid imagery and beautiful choice of words and packed with passion.The metaphors are fresh and not run of the mill which adds to the overall charm of the poem.Can I ask you to explain the last two lines to me please.Is the firebird a jetliner!!And what are 30 mm dreams?Thanks.


  • NurseChilly gold member
    November 23, 2003
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    Don't let someone take your eyes hun, they are the pathway to your soul, never release everything, even in the throws of passion and desire for you have to keep a little back in order to shine like a jewel.. brilliance comes from within not some lack-lustre image.. GREAT WRITE!!!

    ~GILL~xx


  • Madison Attitude
    November 23, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Excellent..
    PeaceLily


  • November 23, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    it's sexy, it's very trippy and it felt a bit bubbly but the colours sorted all that out - it all feels very strange doesn't it.
    yep.
    well i love your poem and the woodworm will as well won't he because he a a soppygit - but that's okay because that's good. i think.
    prickly bed, i thought that bit was a bit cheeky.
    yeah.
    cool.


  • Runawaytrain
    November 23, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    spreading like a bed of flowers

    I have found that a lot of people get very crude when they describe physical love, but this is beautiful! So much emotion in here. I could feel it deep in my chest as I read.


  • myrataal silver member
    October 16, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    A well-layered poem, put together with glee (oh, you enjoyed yourself with this one, did you not? ), the most interesting metaphors, familiar and soooooooo ecovative.

    You, my dearest Lute, are fleeing from a very, very dangerous army, here! Watch out ... Tsk, tsk, tsk ... (shaking head with empathy) ... You know where to hide as a final and very last, desperate option, don't you? I will never, never, never allow her to get at you ...

    Take care,

    Myra

    Ps. You've done it AGAIN! I love it to see our bevy of beautiful Poet friends lining up to impress you ... Aren't they the most wonderful bouquet? How I adore this place.


  • DarkAngel2
    October 16, 2003
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    Very good imagery as others have said. I wasn't sure what this was gonna be when I clicked on it but it was worth it Great write, thanks for sharing it Keep up the good writing

    Sarah
    ~*~Angel~*~
    If words fail you, remember nobody has to know your mistakes.


  • poetryality silver member
    October 16, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    Sorry for the double click. Read it before!

    Didn't want to waste my click or your points so I'll say it again my friend I LOVED IT!!! Very vivid imagery.

    Peace
    ~poetryality~
    Edited on Oct 16, 10:08 p.m. because ''.


  • stop drop and roll
    October 16, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    "while you climb from limb to limb
    adore adore adore.
    Lick my lips dry
    of your sanctity
    and clear my crusted eyes
    while what's left of in-between
    watches you walk away " This was my favorite part of this poem. It really spoke to me. We are a lot alike you and me. i didnt think so when I first met you but ...we are.~Daina


  • Kalexi
    September 26, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Lute

    This is simply amazing I', pretty much at a loss for words

    Incredible images float before me

    Take care,

    Karen

    Looks for her red licorice


  • poetryality silver member
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    Great Work of Art!

    Okay Mr. Lute who is this temptress that causes your heart to tell such a tale, and she lures you with sweets too. This is a fantastic word puzzle, making me search for missing pieces in the lines that are vividly strung. This was well thought out it seems. Your sparrow's roar, caught my attention from the beginning as I traveled along with you on this forbidden journey.

    Great work of art with the red licorice, and the howling wind, and the bed of flowers...You just worked your butt off with this one. Loved it.

    Thanks for reading and commenting on the poems my students wrote. Ashley will be happiest most of all.

    much Love,
    Renee


  • Desiree Darkk
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Don't do it Lute. She'll take you for a ride on the fast train to hell. Wow this is very vivid and I have to agree with Irene. Me too. Excellent piece so much so that I was attacked by the "Web Site Not Responding
    The web site you have requested may be experiencing technical difficulties due to a busy or broken server" bug, and I still remembered my comment but I did read this again.

    Desiree


  • Lakota
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    A very interesting write, very enjoyable, almost like you are being devoured. No escpae from the sinner you love. One line made me go ewww was clear my crusted eyes LOL hmm!

    Lakota xx


  • macandrew
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    very good

    Excellent. Such a frustrating world and yet we would not give up our constant search for companionship for anything.

    Favorite lines:

    spreading like a bed of flowers
    just to catch my interest,
    so I won't run away anymore.


    Loved the Tesla reference.

    and I flash like some giant electrode
    on Tesla's Siberian plain

    Down with Edison.

    John


  • September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    reminds me of love in technicolor
    in techno music yet with
    a touch of nature.. maybe a birds eye view sort of thing...
    you know.. licorice is used for adrenaline...
    lol
    i hurt in this.. like film has slivered in between
    my fingers like paper cuts...


  • maria
    September 24, 2003
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    You may hear the roar of the sparrow, disguised in something, someone that haunts your dreams and days and nights. You may
    love the howl of the wind, for the wind is a friend, a lover, always faithful to its nature. But the wind is also arrogant, selfish. And we feel and know its spell, down to the marrow of our bones. The howling wind makes me think of the minstrel's song. The delicate sound of the harp or the lute hides a passion that can only be whispered for fear of angering the gods, for fear of losing one's mind.
    And you. Rash & impatient
    spreading like a bed of flowers
    just to catch my interest,
    so I won't run away anymore.
    afraid, but not completely dead;
    to vomit on your shore...
    these for me are words that painfully and wonderfully depict the total abandonment of the self, everything...
    a complete letting go.
    Thanks,
    Maria

  • Twisted Enigma
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    A brilliant poem, for of masterful word choice and vivid imagery. Often enough we hate the power that others have over our hearts and I can well relate to this poem. Awesome write and thanks for sharing.
    The Demented Sonneteer


  • Manicmuze
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    * sigh

    Okay, this is one of your best i think... just brilliant!
    So many fantastic lines and images, not to mention the content and unique way you've said what you've said here...

    Just wow, WOW !!
    ~ Wendy

    p.s. saving this one


  • September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    You have a way with words that I wish I possessed. Very cleverly done. Irene


  • jenneddin silver member
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    controlling
    how I am
    and who I am not
    is the difference
    between being red
    or playing with green

    With my cross
    in the darkness
    I can never
    forgive myself
    Spreading my legs
    as I open my mouth
    hating what usually
    comes out


  • MermaidSinging
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Okay, you always make me looks stuff up...why must you reference things I don't know...making me learn and stuff...darn Tesla's Siberian plain reference. Okay, I'm over it...really.

    Moving on:
    "And you. Rash & impatient
    spreading like a bed of flowers "
    I almost missed the meaning here, reading to fast I guess.
    "while you climb from limb to limb
    adore adore adore."
    Neat little section...never would have thought to use that description...clever.
    From now on, only write about cartoons and the alphabet so I know what you're referring to...thank you.


  • Desire gold member
    September 24, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    Big hugs

    Oh Lute~ Felt this one and the tug at the heart~ Yousa! Who would do that to Lute~ This was a great release my dear and I hope there is a rainbow for you to smile at~ We like it when Lute smiles~ Big hugs and much love my dear~ Desire


  • Juliet D
    September 23, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    intense.. so many of these lines jumped out at me.. the opening line, the red liccorice, the red, the sparrows roar, the staccato firebird on the beam...

    I loved this - no more to say.

    ~Scarlet

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