Sail on, poet‘s pen!
dreamer and lover
at its helm;
push gently south wind,
across the horizon
of scribbled thoughts,
to meet uncharted lands
of fairest verse;
Down paths
finely hewn;
where words sway
like willows
with each heart’s breath
yield sweet and bitter,
to nourish the mind;
a journey through joy,
sorrowful cities
bordered by tears,
crossing T's,
dotting I’s,
until the end;
When I go home,
this dreamer and lover
amongst strangers,
pen in hand,
ready to sail again
on a paper sea.
A contest entry
- Prewrites that dont suck. by parachute fog.
400 points, ended October 20, 2007, 93 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Come Convince me I'm not Wasting my Time With AP! by Minstrel Knight.
800 points, ended September 27, 2007, 21 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Quote Contest by Danna Hobart.
550 points, ended August 15, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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This is reallly really nice. I enjoyed reading it. Keep writing.
Aishu -
I really enjoyed this metaphor! Great imagery. Thank you very much for entering.
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Wow I love this congratulations on your bronze. When I go home, this dreamer and lover amongst strangers, pen in hand, ready to sail again on a paper sea. This is just so excellent you have a way with your words. Thank you for sharing and I enjoyed.
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Perfect! IMHO
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haha i loved this! its very funnnn! and it makes me wanna write more poems hahaha. this was awesome!
and congrats on the bronze trophy... it defffinitely deserved one!
hee hee great job i loved it.
huggggggggglezzzz
adria
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very nice work i can see why it got the trophy good job keep it up...
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It was really good!!
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the words travel picking all those things --human emotions and conditions filled with nature also--and fill the poets' mind to flow out later like this ...nice poem
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Oh I love that you wrote and ode to our dear muses! Beautiful flow, and this is just how I feel about writting poetry. It is like our lifes journy to me, unseen lands and new adventures we'd never even know to find...
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Oh, suhWEET! That's a really cool metaphor.
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I love the rhythm of this poem and the way it flows off the page (urhm...screen). Thanks for sharing this!
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great write
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Pretty good
I love sea,swimming,adventure and sailing and i think that makes a good poem....Cheers!!!!!
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...this is such a wonderful piece ma'am, i like it!!!! somehow it encouraged and inspired me...every person ( or poets) is the captain of their own sail to the mysterious world of rhyming letters...
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An excellent piece of work with a good flow. Having Parkinsons can be difficult. A childhood friend was stricken at retirement age it takes strength to perservere I wish you well. Happy trails
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This is a beautiful poem. I love the sailing metaphors.
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This is Good! (well written)
A paper sea where we find
symbols we ourselves designed,
where we write what will be
symbols of what we love
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sometimes it almost feels as if you are tethered to the mast of your pen, as imagination soars, and you are propelled across oceans of thought,
to the islands of contentment, basking in the shades of your work's many colors. lovely write~~~Artis
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Wonderful! I like the realtion of writing to sailing...The wind as inspiration pushing the writer (the pen) on towards the finished product--or in the case of the metaphor-- the shore. So mnay interpretations can be seen here and that is poetry.
Good job! -
I just LOVE it! It crests the emotions of sailing on the purplest of seas! The pen and canvas become good friends and show us that they flow into the same veins
where scripts and post scripts gather!
I like the form overall. It phrases each emotion
expectantly!
*suggestions*
Only changes I would make is to show low-case for the following:
crossing T's,
dotting I’s,
Wonderful. Congratulations on the bronze.....a worthy win!
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i love it..
god bless -
I loved the line "on a paper sea" That had a great sound to it. I also really like the idea of the whole poem. I have heard the idea of poems being therapy before, but never a pathway to your dreams. I very much enjoyed this read.
Write on!
Sarah
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Nicely done. Nothing too moody or deep, but a fairly evocative dream-like description of writing a poem. I got the image of a paper boat with a pen for a mast floating across the paper leaving words in its wake. Seeing as how you never really stated anything like that I call this a success that you could provoke such unique vivid images with not so many words. One criticism I have though, is that in the lines "crossing T's, dotting I's" you might want to put the T and I in lower case, since you don't really cross an uppercase T nor to you dot an uppercase I.
Thanks for entering and good luck. -
Evocative
I really liked this, just lovely.
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Excellent.
I really like this. Maybe cause my well has been dry for a while. Im glad I stopped by.
Joe
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Wow!
That was great! I love it! Keep going!
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Beautiful job of discribing writting as a journey. Your discription was right on, and makes one reflect.
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What a perfect explanation of the journey, (and it is indeed a journey) of writing. Excellent description of the twists and turns along the path. Awesome write. Good luck in the contest.
Jeannie
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very good
the adventures of writing are never ending, just like the adventures of reading
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