Draw the parallel lines, but make them crooked
your bitter tone tells me you know the difference.
If you take a pen and write a protective circle around your life
can you mask the flurry of your hands from your mind?
The tattered paper is drawing mundane scratchings--
you say your disinterest proves they hold no significance,
but even if you don't let your right hand know your left
doesn't mean you aren't responsible for what both are doing.
Stamp me with your forgetful eyes of innocence
The ink of them cold with spotted liquid
watered down to run the course to your fingertips.
Touch my cheek with the utmost tenderness
leave your mark--and me, alone, to contend with it.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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I like this, its obscure in a way I can relate with.
a beautiful way to describe this, kudos love.
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WOW, this is a very good write, I love the line, Touch my cheek with the utmost tenderness, its beautiful.
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I really liked the imagery in this poem, and I felt like it had a nice flow. Emotional
Great read
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Very well written here
I write my inner feelings in all my poetry . And it has helped me get through heartaches and disapointments throughout my life. To help others you first look within and find your own inner peace then you are worthy to reach out
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one of the ways i 'test' a poem is to read it aloud, yours sounds brilliant, dear poet, simply brilliant.
blessings and best wishes,
~richard
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Thank you very much!
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Really good work, excellent imagery. The first line is superb, I also particularly like "If you take a pen and write a protective circle around your life/ can you mask the flurry of your hands from your mind?" I didn't like the title so much, "Moment Between You and Me" is good but I felt "Paper and Ink Do so Many Things" was a bit of a bland statement. In a way it works to creat curiosity, though, so I'm in two minds about it. Anyway, I enjoyed this piece, keep up the great work!
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There is much wisdom in this piece.
"but even if you don't let your right hand know your left
doesn't mean you aren't responsible for what both are doing." these lines, along with the finial line, really spoke to me. A very nice piece here, full of symbolism and emotion.
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I partially took that line from the Bible. Though it's intent and mine are two completely different things...
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I love this poem. It is reflecting just how I feel today when so many people say one thing and mean another.
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Awesome I really, really like this!Enormously thought provoking.Kindest thoughts and intentions
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