we traffic in souls on scented paper
bound to golden grab bags of
glitter laid waste by the wind
smell the page
don't read between the linear look of perfection
lest you see the truth
truth kills
you know
your skills
could blow your chances of salvation
roads paved in fear
in dear and dreary dominance
of those penning policy
social circles kept sacred
lock out the locals
riff raff must be contained
tell them they are happy
tell them they are brave
tell them they are free
in shackles strategically placed around the throat and
ankles
lost to roadside bombs
and poverty
minimum wage is all the rage
in six figure incomes
or was it eight
to state the obvious
lull them all to sleep
with chants of nine one one
in a chorus of
we care so you don't need to
A contest entry
- 100th Contest ....for my Favorites by MuddyKing.
10000 points, ended September 23, 2007, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Reader interpretation and critical comment welcomed
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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That's right, lull them all to sleep while the dreams we anticipate are obvious, or am I kidding myself?
Here is a poem which is shown as the senses. It speaks of the soul, but the inner sanctum is one which "Roads paved in fear", which really is awareness. Feel, smell, listen, taste and through them we can see everything we want. I suppose the roadside bombs are our mistakes, and if I've got the metaphor wrong then forgive me. "your skills
could blow your chances of salvation", I would say is the freedoms to choose, rightly or wrongly. The word, 'Pretty' seems to be this freedom. Good work,
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so much good stuff
makes me wish I wrote it
your skills
could blow your chances of salvation, is my favorite line.
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Well done
I like the abruptness of the lines:
truth kills
you know
Placed perfectly. Rolling to a sudden stop before continueing on. -
Well done
I like the abruptness of the lines:
truth kills
you know
Placed perefectly. Rolling to a sudden stop before continueing on.
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Very Strong stuff
Lets hope that most of us are better than that. I still bleed for the unfortunate. I Love your work.
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I CAN ONLY SAY...
...that I liked what I read and look forward to reading more of your work because I believe it is very good.
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this one gave me chills when I first read it, last night I had pizza and beer with two buddies, one has two sons and the other has one over in the sand. Most people see the TV and think what they want us to think
you have always been keen with society, and this write needs to be seen by a bigger audience than AP...hell have you been deleting comments
I can't belive the others haven't commented
the poetic device used was great but, the message and voice is what got to me
peace and hugs
muddy
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Thanks eh sometimes folks arent all that comfy with the topic. Other times they just don't know what to say.
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