tendrils of rain
through maple leaves -
he loves me,
he loves me not
Author notes
image #23
Ideally, i would like to write it in 4 lines...
And thanks to Jo that i could write it the way i wanted to.
A contest entry
- The Avatar Haiku Contest by NoWayJo.
600 points, ended September 16, 2007, 30 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Oh! This is beautiful, absolutely! Love the imagery and the unending openess of this haiku. Congratulations on the Silver!
Happy Ram Navmi to you and yours,
Charishma
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Ooh, look at you. Nabbing the SILVER with this one. I haven't been on much but had to see what you were up to! Congratulations--well deserved! Hugs, ♥ Belle
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Hi Belle, where you have been? Thank you so much for your comment.
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bengalibelle ,
Great response to your avatar target picture. Well Done!
Dennis
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What an elegant and beautiful haiku. It is as gorgeous as the avatar you selected to use for inspiration, another beauty by your pen.
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I really like what you saw in this image, Bengali, and "tendrils of rain" is a very evocative image.
If you'd prefer to edit it to four lines, it's fine by me. I think splitting the third to a fourth line really has a more powerful effect in the reading of this haiku and adds an artistic nature to the words placed that way.
Hoping you meant your Author's Notes as a split in this line... :)
Thanks so much for your entry to the contest!
Jo
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Thanks jo, you are such a dear! I would revise it.
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