As she stares at the cross
images fill her mind.
A small boy playing in the field,
no cares in the world.
A teen building tables with his father,
his hands calloused and strong.
A young man teaching the children,
surrounded by the crowd.
But now...
The cares of the world rest on his shoulders.
His hands are broken and bloodied.
He struggles for understanding, alone.
She is overcome with grief as she cries out
"My God... My lord... My son"
Author notes
Image provided by contest holder
In a list
A contest entry
- Second Image by PhoenixFox.
700 points, ended September 12, 2007, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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Moving
This is a very touching poem that strikes into the heart of the reader. One of the things that I believe people seldom consider regarding the Virgin Mary is the pain she felt during the crucifixion, not for the death of a prophet, but for the pain of her son.
Well done. -
I can very clearly see this poem in the image. Well done! As a person, Mary probably understood what her son needed to do and that he was fulfilling his destiny. But as a mother, it would be tremendously hard to see your child go through what he did. You have a small typo in S2L4: you want "calloused". (An easy mistake to make.) Glad I got the chance to read this!
~Phoenix
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Thanks for the comment and the and I changed the spelling of callused to calloused. I think both are right but you are the judge and I cave to authority (lol).
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They are very similar, but if you look them both up you will find that only "calloused" is an adjective and that was how you used it...at least according to the dictionary I used.
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nice
Mary as human is very moving, her particular strength is that of all women, able to love, nurture and support, and let go. Spiritual on a human level
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I love this, as I can never think of Mary without thinking of how her heart must have broken like any other Mother's. THis is soft and subtle, hitting emotion. Well done.
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very powerful and emanating. Defiantly leaves you with something. touching and spiritual.
Well Done, good luck in the contest!!!
Creatress -
Very Touching
A beautiful poem -
Very spiritual.
My first impression is of a mothers love for her child. Emotionally this is a beautiful image created by beautiful words. There is nothing awkward in this and as such should not be changed. My favorite part is the first two lines, however all of this is very well done. The title states just what this is abought. The first and last lines start and end this perfectly. A very beautiful poem.
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Certainly brought tears to my eyes--every time I pray I will think of your poem! Spiritual poetry is so hard and I think you have managed a beautiful and moving poem--one that I will remember every time I see an image of Mary. Excellent poem and good luck in the contest!
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