There is something welcoming,
a hesitant breeze conjuring tricks,
a flow of sounds and words
intricate and flexible through sunlit tears.
You stare arrogantly at me,
I hear your breath in airless strides,
the daylight burnishing your hair
with flecks of gold, I dream of you…
Immortal and possessive,
the sea’s current drags me away
and somehow I cling to you,
hypnotised, afraid to be alone.
I stare at you through centuries of time,
through arched doorways and crumbling walls,
following your footprints in the sand,
Your voice my dark opium.
Lost in your caress, the fire of my addiction,
intimate and reassuring,
you soothe my troubled heart,
tempt, betray then calm my fears.
A contest entry
- Let's Talk About Love (Members only For Romantics Dreamers) by jasminerose.
700 points, ended September 21, 2007, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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This definitely deserved your prize, it was a bit spooky, too, but I like that.
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Good
I sorely miss the rhyme.
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well written it has a mystical air about it that enhances the feelings of being lost in the arms of the one you love and the feelings are real its not a faked poem this is dripping with the raw emotions that this type of poetry demands
well done -
Beautiful and heartfelt write. Showing us all how timeless love can be. Absolutely beautiful. Great job.
Josh
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This is very beautiful, Room.
It has been a while, I was and you have not been writing much. Missed you! and missed your writing.
Anyways, these were my favourite lines:
"I stare at you through centuries of time,
through arched doorways and crumbling walls,
following your footprints in the sand,
Your voice my dark opium.
Lost in your caress, the fire of my addiction"
Keep on writing and goo luck in the contest.
Nooni -
This is such a beautiful poem with so much love and tenderness. Thank you so much for sharing this. I loved the lines "intimate and reassuring you soothe my troubled heart". Such lovely lines.
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Hi Rooms
Beautifully written with so much emotion!!! Wow, you really outdid yourself with this poem! Love,romance,lost in your caress,, how absloutely perfect this all is!
Thank you so very much for entering and sharing this beautiful, emotionally moving piece with us all!!
Linda
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beautiful! dreaming of being with someone that brings comfort amid all life's turmoils is well worth it... i could easily get lost in this poem.
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I find the fear factor ringing through this one. Has a 'Devil you know' feel.
The images I got from this were clear-cut and I could feel the emotion within your words.. You have written a fantastic slice of poetry here...
Well done Beth
Jeffro
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Very nice and romantic verses. It is always hard to say something wise when your poetry is on the table. Only I can quote you:
~
I stare at you through centuries of time,
through arched doorways and crumbling walls,
following your footprints in the sand,
Your voice my dark opium.
~
Huh... Perfect!
~Sonja~
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a good mixture here of emotions, tumbling the spirit as love openly rides the heart, a sens of loss i picked up here, the sighs rollercoasting the skin, a good poem.
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Promise...sing
Atypical submission in all senses of the term from one who has accustomed us to turn to one whose intimate and reassuring verse usually soothes her readers' troubled hearts without following their footprints in the sand,
with voice as dark opium.
...a flow of sounds and words
intricate and flexible through sunlit tears.
conjuring tricks .... I dream of you… Immortal and possessive
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