I found myself
Lying on the bed
Crying
Listening to the rain…
I need a path…
Wich leads me to the end
Of this pain
The meaning of feeling
Has vanished
The sky
Has gotten dark
The air is deep and heavy
It’s so hard to breath
It’s so hard to smile
Pain is burning
Inside my heart
I’m praying for this
To be my last day of life.
So, I grab the razor
I slit my skin…
Now, there are as many scars
In my heart
As there are on my wrist
I don’t know
If this will stop the pain….
Or the shame….
Of being who I am.
But I’m sure of something,
Someday, this will lead me
To the end
In a list
Please tell me what you think :)
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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love it
I rli love this one.. i can rli relate to it
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8 out of 10
This poem is really sad you know, but it's well good. It's like you exchange your physical pain for your emotional pain. Keep up with the good work. :3
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Sometimes... we want to transfer our emotional pains to physical pains... cause we know that it hurts less...
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So sad
Its so sad that people today holds pain inside until it whispers there is nothing left .Whe I feel crazy then everyone thinks I am to cause I let out a scream that would curdle your blood . Once I do this I feel much better and it really doesnt hurt at all but lets out all those unpure thoughts and sometimes by the look on other peoples faces even brings on a smile and I start my day all over again .
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Flawless. You wrote a very good peice here.
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This is an intense poem.
My first impression is that this is very intense and sad. Emotionally I hope that this is not you, you are refering to. And if it is that you can get these feelings out in your writing instead of on yourself. You with your writing ability have so much to give to yourself and the world that it would be a shame for anything bad to happen to you. Bless you and don't ever stop writing. There are a few places in this that make it awkward to read, here are a couple of suggestions, in the second verse, second line should be (leads) not (leaves). In the fourth verse last line I would say, last day either (of life) or (to live.) I do not have a favorite part as it is all very well done. The title is perfect for this and the first line works well with this poem. The last line sums up just what this is all about in the best way possible. Very well done.
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Is A great poem,i like it and i feel myself related to this poem.Also you're a great poet and your feelings are deep,really deep.Keep on doing great poems,I'll check them all :]
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Thank you guys for all your comments! =)
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The ending is a fitting summary of the poem. I'm big on endings...drag the reader through your heart, envelope them in gore, twist their thoughts with your intellect and open their eyes to something they can't imagine when all is said and done.
I didn't start writing poetry until I was about 18 or so. Considering your age, this is extremely well penned. Poetry, like the razor...can be just as sharp, and almost as cathartic.
Welcome to Allpoetry.
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I love it. it really is like a work of art sensuall and dark. I really love the picture it goes well with the poem.it left me wanting to go cut myself.
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This is a really sad but Good write.I can relate to this poem .The meaning of feeling
Has vanished
The sky
Has gotten dark
The air is deep and heavy
It’s so hard to breath
It’s so hard to smile
Sometimes life takes everything and leaves you nothing
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