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A Flame No Longer Burns

we toast and drank
the wine of our happiness

 it filled our hearts with
marital bliss

until one day you
no longer felt the same

leaving me holding

a flaming rose


a dieing heart

mine....

Author notes

under construction....

In a list

Please tell me what you think

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Comments


  • suseann
    October 12, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Sad love sometimes fades like the rose. Especially when exposed to cold.Strong relating of emotions.


  • checkmate
    October 12, 2007

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    This was such a beautiful write. Heartfelt and tangible. This was so wonderfully penned.

    simply beautiful.


  • penman gold member
    October 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Wow

    Oh my this was so powerful. And the ending. Whew!


  • NoWayJo
    September 7, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    I don't know if by your Author's Notes this is a poem you're still working with, Brenda, but my only advice is not to re-work and rewrite the simplicity you've drawn so far. It's a scene and metaphor of love as it passes away, and works well to my reading.

    It's a touching poem to which so many can relate...

    Jo