When the darkest days have fallen upon thee,
when you feel the thinning of that mortal thread onto which your soul so delicately balances,
like a raven balances on its cold dead perch,
only then,
can the pale moonlight shine through and awaken thy heart.
Light the fire behind your darkened eyes and illuminate your black soul.
For only when one has nothing can one truly understand existence and all of it's infinities.
So as the light of creation is brightest in the blackened skies of dawn,
the blackened pit of despair and loathing shall reach it's syneth at the moment of true enlightenment.
And at this moment,
when the darkest days have fallen upon thee,
when you feel the thinning of that mortal thread onto which your soul so delicately balances,
thy essence of being shall shout out to you,
cries from within, to push you beyond.
For without the taste of darkness ever touching your lips,
One can never truly understand the light.
Author notes
Birth through Knowledge
In a list
A contest entry
- Let's see what you can do. by Mujina.
450 points, ended September 9, 2007, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 5 options for the creative poet (18) by bananasfoster42.
525 points, ended December 17, 2007, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Rise Today! by Acidanthra.
800 points, ended March 3, 2008, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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a good piece of poetry penned, let the light shine through the darkest days and swirl into the freedom of knowledge.
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Superb
Aye a very fine write indeed. The concepts you've expressed so well reminds me of Gibran, and other classical poets. Again, well done. -
I liked these lines: 'So as the light of creation is brightest in the blackened skies of dawn,
the blackened pit of despair and loathing shall reach it's syneth at the moment of true enlightenment.' they're kinda creepy feeling, but well-written, only I'm confused. Did you mean the word 'zenith' in line 9, kinda wondering there. But I can see why you won gold for this, that is for sure. Excellent writing and it all just makes sense to me. Love it.
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Exquisite
I can easily tell why you got the gold with this wonderful exquisite write..
so richly deserved dear poet
how well you capture and describe the journey
a 'birth through knowledge'
BRAVO
s s David
s Lib x
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One line blending perfectly with the next and the ending... was just as exquisitely penned. Great job here. Thank you for sharing this with me and best wishes in all of your endeavors. Keep that pen handy and ever ready for use dear poet.
♥ Touchof1der -
Darkness nurtures many things... Not all of them are evil... Very deep message within... Congrats. on ALL the trophys...esp. the Gold!
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SUPERB
This superb piece made me feel I had forgotten to pray! I have been shaken to the core of my heart. This reminded me of a favourite devotional song -
A PRAYER
When life dries up
Come in a shower of mercy
When all beauty dies
Come as an elixir of songs
When troubles envelop
Like rumbling clouds of storm
In silent footsteps come my friend
And stand at the threshold of my heart.
When my mind is barren as a miser
Like a poor wretch in a corner it sleeps
Come as the bounteous king
And open its gate
When desires like a storm of dust
Blinds me and leads me astray
Like a thunder come with your light.
--------------------------------
Transcreation of the devotional song – Jivan jakhan shukaye jay korunadharay eso – by Rabindranath Tagore. Compare poem 39 of the English Gitanjali.
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wow. this is amazing. great write!!
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This speaks of something important...appreciation of life and the gifts innate within our own spirits.
This also has been recognized as it is a strong write with a message that should touch us all. I do allow prewrites for opts 3&4 but see no link & this obviously does not pertain to soulmates. Blue -
People's perspective on darkness can be very different. Not really thought of it from this point of view before. Liked the message and the gold trophy you won with this writ. Nice going.
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I like not only the thought, message and idea behind this piece, but the wording used gives it a very old or classic feel.
Far too many people see the dark and darkness (in every sense of the words) as a bad or negative thing. People just couldn't be more wrong. For it is the dark that bears the light, if you cannot see clearly one, you cannot relate or appreciate the other.
Good write.
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aaah. I love your style of writing...it really keeps me captivated...
"For without the taste of darkness ever touching your lips,
One can never truly understand the light."
^_^ nice write. I enjoy reading your stuff.
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Awesome...
I do like the style of text that you have become accomplished in. This is truelly deserving of the goldie rewarded. congrats.
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this is well worthy of the gold
I believe she did a great job
in the way she picked this
for you wrote a story that
is very deep and thought
provoking
Riftkin -
Very insightful, poet. This a moving and powerful piece, thank you for this entry!
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Wonderfully Done
I loved the closing two lines, you are exactly right. It is only due to he dimness of night that a sunrise light can be so revealing, literally and figuratively. Your use of ocabulary and the flow of the piece added to my enjoyment. Best of Luck! -
Very deep, so much meaning here lying beneath these words that seemed to have poured out of your soul! Excelent peice.
"Light the fire behind your darkened eyes and illuminate your black soul.
For only when one has nothing can one truly understand existence and all of it's infinities."
This part was very interesting. Great wriet and good luck in your contests!!!
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