a while ago engaging
now your gauge is fading
it's redeemable
it would seem and all
roses die
so do you
pressed a flower
you
your pressed dress
dress to impress
so the lady does
so the lady does
colour and curves
lines and words
like the poet does
like the poet does
paint a rainbow riot
quite quiet
shows bows and toes
a nose
body's parts
all and each part
dead or alive
pressed in colour
impressive impression
that life in death
pressed roses
as the lady does
as the lady does
look
in her coffin some day
A contest entry
- Beautiful - 500 for gold! by be a circle.
650 points, ended September 10, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
okay this is a very powerful and deep
life and even death in this poem
nicely written
Riftkin -
Deep and full of life. You write without hard pressing words but with soft flowing ones. Great job. Keep them coming. God bless you in all that you do.
Tabitha -
This savours strongly of bitterness, as far as I can tell.
It's lovely really, in that the lady in this poem is obviously NOT lovely in your eyes, not anymore unless I am mistaken. This woman lives up to a fake standard of beauty that will always fail, and I can only thank God that He thinks she is beautiful even if she struggles with being fake. Her gauge will never fade with God.
Thanks for entering, and best of luck! -
-
I guess you could read bitterness here.
I had in mind not that when she's alive making her alive makes her ugly say, and her death makes her beautiful, like an attack on the living. Instead I was exploring the beauty of the image of life even in death as a continuation of life. Like the yellow rose my grandmother picked out for grandfather's lapel that my mother keeps -- it's dried out -- a memory/symbol of the living. I was trying a different twist on the romantic realization of beauty in its transcendence into image through life and death. It's not that dying makes her more beautiful so much as it continues her beauty in image. We experience this power in still life paintings or pictures or pressed flowers we keep.
Fact:
Girls die.
So do roses.
I like the correlation of that
of pressed dresses
and rose petals
because to me it's a reworking of a cliche
that we should compare girls to roses as some happy
romantic lively thing. But roses do die and that's romantic too
and so do pretty things -- it's sad, but at the same time
that reminder of humanity --that thought I find inspiring
and beautiful. That link of humanity and nature is always beautiful especially in death or other impressions of life like paintings. When it comes to life and how exactly we picture it's beauty or the beauty of anything in it we don't focus well on movement because the image blurs. We focus on snap shots, still life, moments of death, of time stops and immovable moments -- these still images we catalogue as beauty.
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