touch me tease me
kiss me please me.
roam my body
e.x.p.l.o.r.e
me freely
pull my hair, scream
my name. leave
s/c/r/a/t/c/h/e/s
on my back give me my
[moment of fame]
make me cry with joy;;
make me scream with
passion. make me
explode inside
[like its going
out of fashion]
kiss me here
{bite me there}
find my G-spot
..its the right spot..
[make it feel like we're
having an affair]
roll me over when your
done. [thanks for making
this night of sin so fun]
leave my place ++without a
trace++ forget my name but
>>remember<< my face.
Author notes
lol Howdy! im Dani...uhh idk where i got this idea..and if you knew me...this totally doesnt sound like me...lmao...and this was the first time i thought i'd take on this theme or genre of writing
enjoy!!
-------------------------------------------
opt 3...
__________________________________________________
'the radio told me to stay'
opt.3
___________________________________________________
Dani The Great
opt. e
______________________________________________________
Pink bows, Pretty words, and pixie sticks"
TheSPork Princess
A contest entry
- Options, heaps to choose from by ForgottenMemories.
650 points, ended September 17, 2007, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Hold me, and tell me we'll burn like stars...(options!) by LearningHow2Smile.
700 points, ended September 10, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Affair -I Bleed- by adsaige.
300 points, ended September 17, 2007, 3 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - *** Untitled Contest *** by Hebz.
425 points, ended September 21, 2007, 74 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - an option contest about......stuff lol by Xx52sLittleTrampxX.
450 points, ended October 2, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me your Cliche Dirty-Pretty Prewrites!! by danceswsquirrels.
500 points, ended October 13, 2007, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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3/3/4/3
=
3.25
Thanks for entering and following the rules!!
This.. was... hot... ZOMG! I love the short broken descriptions.. yesss.....
J~~~ -
Funny & awesome...kool & naughty
I like all expressed here, very well done!!
Thnx for ur entry & Best of Luck
GloriousGift
Heba -
this did not impress me. it was trite and the various punctuation marks were unnecessary and annoying. Nothing you said really invited me to feel this poem. rhyme...don't do it unless you're good. Fit the rhyme to the poem, not the poem to the rhyme.
-
-
well arent u a lovely little downer.
Im sorry u have no feelings i truly am...
and i am thankful for ur uhh...opinion.
The punctuation was for dirty pretty. And i am good at rhyming thank you. anyway. have a little sincerity when you comment..because blunt is such an ugly look ^_^
<3Dani
-
-
LOVE IT!
I love this poem. it is sooo cool I can really relate to it. i didn't know anyone wrote like this!
-
Fabulous, Dani!
Very funny, great piece!
GL in all your contests!!
Jin
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good write you have yourself here hun. the fact you have decided t o tackle a different genre is cool. at least your open to new ideas. Anyway
good work. keep it up
huggles
xxxx -
tee hee!! my name is dani too!! well done on this very smexi piece of writing! and nice to meet u fellow Dani!!
love coop AKA Dani
-
this is awesome!
-
Well, it's good that you're taking a new take on something..you never know, this might be one of your strong points in poetry. Thank you for the entry...and I think I do know you, and I know this isnt your style of writing. Gl in the contest.
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I like it! it is very interesting in a lot of ways but it is very descriptive and passionate. good write
-
wow. if im correct this is dirty pretty, isnt it? well, i liked it all in the same. got the senses going for this morning. thanks so much for sharing.
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I like it - straight to the finalists list.
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It's good for your first attempt at this genre! I like the word choices, thank you for not overpunctuating, it's a very good piece!
[make it feel like we're
having an affair]
Favorite line! -
oooooh lol
very dirty poetry
but its good
-
Erotic and naughty. Someone felt bad that night. Great write. Nice flow and imagery. Good luck in the contests.
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this is cute, I like it, good job on your first try and good luck in the contest
-
well this was certainly interesting! Lol
I enjoyed reading your poem, it was very well written, and the person who commented below my comment is right.. it's exactly what a 1 night stand would be like.
Thanks for entering and good luck!
Sleep-N -
This is Cute
This is just what a one night stand should be like. Get em in, turn em out then put them out. This is pretty good for your first time. May your ink never dry. Hugs~ Cuddles
PS: Good luck in the contest. -
Really catchy.
Smooth rymes, immaginative lyrics... kool.
Reminds me of many fantastic nights.
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