there once a blade that met a wrist
the blade did its job but it missed
now the blood pours on the floor
im waiting for a knock on the door
a tap a ring a rat a tat tat
im felling stupid im such a twat
this pain is evil or is it healing
i feel the pain as my head its the ceiling
im all alone in the dark room called life
will i marry a woman or this cold knife
im making a decision with this gun
to point at me, my mother or the sun
fire a clip for all my pain
this blade useless its missed my vain
abuse can be thrown or recieved
but the throwers will be decieved
when they realise im slicing there throats
i will make them read my sucide notes
make them feel my fucking sorrow
it will be there lives i will borrow
they know who they are and what they've done
they will learn to run
away from me the roles have changed
im not crazy diffrent or deranged
im myself im one im the same
those that are dead by my hands those are the ones to blame
cause now im dead this is the last of my speech
i am suciadal im the one you couldnt reach
the bullied, the used, the target your only true lover
i was crushed when she found another
Author notes
number 2
i thought of high school thts depressing enough
amount of times i have wanted to die beacuse of bullies, relationships and an un-happy life
A contest entry
- Depressing.... with options by Ntagatf.
500 points, ended September 19, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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You need to give this a little more structure. There is alot of feeling, and emotions which you have conveyed beautifully, just work on the structure of the poem.
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thk you
I did lose the plot a bit but it sounded ok in my head but really i should have read it back slowly thk you
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gulps
>.> <.< been there -
This is very deep but really powerfull. I liked the way you structured this. A brilliant write and good luck in the contest.
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not so great
too many words and not enough transference of the lousy feeling. hope you will feel better soon! -
wow
I really like this, it has such meaning and cold hatred towards those who have harmed you. I can seriously relate but mine wasnt so much high school. How ever this is a great write! Good luck in my contest! And keep up the great work!
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