Uterus is wringing itself out.
Just imagine your sexual organs twisting
'Round and 'round and 'round.
Legs are swelling. Ankles are now "cankles."
Think of your most definitively masculine features
Suddenly softening, becoming delicate.
Now. Ask me again if it's my time of the month.
No, really. I want to hear you say it.
And keep the stupid smile.
And be ready for this frozen tampon to
Pelt you in the back of the head, a missile shot
Which originated in those parts that deem me a woman the most.
You know, the ones whose suffering is so hilarious to you.
Author notes
Man... I'm tired of that question. "Is it that time of month?" Answer: No. I'm pregnant.
A contest entry
- frozen tampons by flaed.
420 points, ended September 10, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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lmao
oh thats funny! verry funny!
just wat i was looking for.
everytime i start i always think, goshdangit, if only mike woulda knocked me up already.
he thinks thats funny.
now lets see, its short and funny. my favorite part being line 12. i like your word choice too.
originated pelt masculine missile deeem hilarious cankles
least favorite part lines 5 and 6. but i really like it. your the first one i've read so uh, don't know how you compare, but if the rest of 'em are like yours im screwed.
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i love it..i totally thing you should win!!!!!
~ love the rain ~
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