The crumbling bricks made me feel
so very young. Paint slowly giving up
it’s once sharp commands.
I smile. Not remembering
when the wall did not represent
time. As the small town around me
grew banks and churches like
summer dandelions
or the fall leaves
that litter our earth.
The one original wall, forgotten
with rail-road tracks
and gravel alleys.
Author notes
I have a wall in my town very much like
the one in your picture, it's very inspiring.
Please comment/critque!
peace to all ~flight
A contest entry
- My First Contest - Picture Inspired by guttermouth.
450 points, ended September 2, 2007, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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wow. I really like how you say "Paint slowly giving up
it’s once sharp commands." Ever line is equally lovely to the preceding. -
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Thanks! Glad you enjoyed!
peace to all ~flight
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beautiful, absolute bliss. nice work jo!!! and now that i saw the picture i think i know which wall your talking about on the the back of the cup. the 7 up one?
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Exactly that wall my dear
peace to all ~flight
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A great offering for this contest. The piece of the small town growing banks and churches like summer dandelions had me momentarily wondering if wyou were writing specifically about my town. Very fine job.
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It seems like all small towns
end up the same way
Thanks for a beautiful contest!
peace to all ~flight
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is this wall like the great wall of china, and what is this wall represented in your town. just like to know.
great piece enjoy reading it.
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The wall is nothing like the great wall of china,
quite the opposite in my vision,
because it fades into the background.
As the ancient great wall of china can be seen
for a long time, this wall takes a
small town observer to notice
I'm very glad you enjoyed and
thank you for the comment!!
peace to all ~flight
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