our view here grows grim
where we forsook to sow
murky memories of fruit,
herbs,
spices
perish with us
if we reject
their quiet whispers
but we might just
eke out
some crumb of success
if the echoes of those voices
survive
otherwise, we too
give up the ghost...
Author notes
Lipograms are a lot harder than they may appear. They are texts that exclude a particular letter or particular letters of the alphabet. This poem does not contain any of the following letters: l, a, n, d
“Touch the earth, love the earth, honour the earth, her plains, her valleys, her hills, and her seas; rest your spirit in her solitary places.”
--Ernest Dimnet
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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some crumb of success
if the echoes of those voices
survive
I really loved those lines. I like the whole poem, but for some reason those lines really stuck out to me. I am not sure that I would be able to write a poem in this kind of format, but I think you did it quite well. You always amaze me with your creativity. Thanks for a delighted read.
~Midnight Lace -
I really like this. I have never attempted a lipogram. I am sure it is a challenge. You have done it well here, and with such a profound message.
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Interesting form. I've not seen them on AP before but then first time I've been to your page. The poem is eloquent in his statement. I like how you have left out the letters spelling land. This is very thought provoking. I love it. Thank you for your notes.
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I remember lipograms and a little fox and a certain windy day
This sinking ship's idling
jibing, listing
in night's wild wind spilt
I, thinking, insist blind skill
will right this bridling tilt
♥ ~ c
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fascinating...
Another lipogram... this time "l,a,n,d"...
I rather like your quotations, also.
I liked the imagery this poem created for me. The style was somewhat different for you, but I really enjoyed it. I think you should try more in this haphazard, open-ended format. Not necessarily just lipograms, but free-verse.
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no land? awesome.
i am so impressed with the whole leaving certian letters our of the piece. especially when it's vowels!!!
anywho... i am sure this has a deep metaphoric meaning and i have just probably grasped the top layer. it is awesome.
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Great job!
Excellent write...
*PEAVE*
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zt, I love this style, I didnt know how to do it but I am going to try..... and I sow my seeds........ great message!
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Good for you. There are too many people who think the world owes them and they shouldn't have to work for things. Thanks for stopping by...
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I will have to look over the contest since I have no idea what style this is and didn't take the time to look before commenting. Sorry! I do know however that you have a gift with words and a natural talent for bringing out the most in a poem. I love the quote in your Author Notes. I have it saved on my computer somewhere but haven't read it in some time. Good Luck in the contest!
♥ Touchof1der
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That's okay. My author's notes should give you a pretty good idea about what I'd done. But if you get a chance, checking out the contest may give you a bit more background on this poem. Your comments are always appreciated!
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