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Up In Smoke

 


Up in smoke I went,
never dreaming this would be
the end of what once was.

 

My heart flaming for your touch,
begging for your love,
never wanting us to end.

 

Now I stand, waiting,
praying the ground will swallow me,
before I am forced by this pain
to do what I know I must do
to bring to an end
the horror I called my life.

 

Up in smoke I went,
thorns through my heart
that came from your touch,
I left you behind,
and now I stand here
ready for whatever happens.

 

Up in smoke...

 

Author notes

I chose #3, background. I was inspired by your poem "dressed in black."

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • Arizona Sunset
    September 27, 2007

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    Wowzers!

    very excellent write. very imagery filled...thorns through my heart
    that came from your touch,
    I love that wording! You are a very talented poet, and I so enjoyed this very much!


  • debilynn gold member
    September 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow! this is fantastic sis! i love your write and your background. your talent shines!!! keep designing! God bless you always


  • leo2
    September 3, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    The profoundness of the first verse I think sums it up best. If I had known it would be like this I certainly would have done things different. Excellent work my friend.

    Sincerely,
    Leo Long


  • SexyAngel0418
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow.. This is an awesome poem gramma!!! You did a great job on this!!! i really enjoyed reading it... So sad but so beautiful!!!

    Hugs,
    Beth

    PS GOod luck in the contest!!!


  • Silent Cougar Moderators member
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    I like it too (only saying that so I get a hug from my big sis) just kidding.

    this is a clever piece Sis, says a lot about the feelings within at the time.  Put across well and the 'repeat' in the last line does it justice.

    well done you.


    • pattyann4500
      September 1, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Now, Mikey, you know you don't have to beg for a hug. You just come and get it. (a few to hold you over)


  • Beating gold member
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    "Up in smoke I went,
    never dreaming this would be
    the end of what once was."
    I love that part, and how you later uses the up in smoke again. You described a lot of thoughts and feelings that I've had before. I really like it. Great job!


    • pattyann4500
      September 1, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, Snow. I think we've probably all had these feelings before. I really appreciate your comment. Hugs, Patricia


  • Sweet Jane
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Beauiful

    Very nice poem,
    I like it alot

1 - 13 of 13