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- Burning Incense in His Wake -

 

 

 

Stampede from his stalemate personality
smoked, smoldered rationality to a frown;

freeze dried and salted teardrops, trickled plenty.

Sage cleansed residual remnants left around
after heart’s  sink hole found in Sacred temple
collected, corralled smile with ominous sound.

Memories delivered, drawings made simple
with tip of wick lit when eulogy whispered;
filled crater dug deep, death’s seductive dimple.

Tempers boiled in cauldron of cries tempered,
portal opened,  protected Spirit whimpered.   









 

 

Author notes

This is your poem title: Burning Incense in His Wake
This is the form you must use: terza rima
www.shadowpoetry.com
A Terza Rima is a poem with an eleven syllable count in each line and a rhyming scheme
of aba, bcb, cdc, dd.

For even more of a challenge, try the Terza Rima Sonnet. This form of poem has an
eleven syllable count in each line and a rhyming scheme of aba, bcb, cdc, ded, ee.

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 16 of 16

  • tony yates silver member
    September 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    very good

    superb use of alliteration, the best i've ever seen, good poem cos it's deep. best wishes your friend tony yates


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    September 14, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    wow dear poet. This here piece speaks with such emotion and beauty, well done here. I am myslef just starting to do forms and i love seeing the works of others. This one captivated me. I believe i have tried this form and did pretty well although, i will say the quality within the write here itself, was definately more intriguing.

    Thanks for sharing such a powerful piece.

    Tory

     

  • Turtle74
    September 13, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    this style is hard to read but i love abstract and everything you write pretty much missed reading your writings started working again not much time for peotry


  • penman gold member
    September 12, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Oh my sweetness, this was amazing. Really takes the breath away.


  • thepoetssoul
    September 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Absolutely breathtaking I really like this form of poetry You did a awesome job on this piece Love the wording and flow OUTSTANDING!!!
    Tony


  • JohnnyD gold member
    September 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    hmmmmmmmm...true love is when the whispered scent of two lovers escapes to the night sky and created is a new star. But this write was sweet as chocolate rain.



    Len


  • Whoochi gold member
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Good Lordy...you ahve outshined yourself beyond all with this outstanding rhyme and description in this.....this spoke to me in only ways my inner self recognize. best of luck!


  • HeavenScent4U
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    wow, i can't fault this one lol is there anything you CAN"T do when it comes to poetry? this is so full of imagery and emotion, form is right on and it just fits the given title perfectly. i really liked this line, it just stood out to me "freeze dried and salted teardrops, trickled plenty"

    this is a very powerful poem from start to finish. thank you for your dedication to this challenge and good luck to you. be well and be blessed


  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! What a form, and if anyone can do it, it is you! Wonderful and emotion studded write. I agree that you are the Queen of Poetry. I don't believe there is anything you can't do. Bravo girl. Well done.

    Jeannie


  • StarEyes
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Holy smokes girly!! What a read this one is!!! Just amazing!!! I don't think I have ever seen this form before, but damn girl, this is powerful and most amazing!!!!

    Memories delivered, drawings made simple
    with tip of wick lit when eulogy whispered;
    filled crater dug deep, death’s seductive dimple.


    Beautiful!!! Best of luck in this contest!!!

    and much love

    Nettie


  • Amera gold member
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Fantastic!

    From the mistress of verse flows a masterpiece! This is amazing! You made the most descriptive words rhyme and created a flow to a powerful image that is liquid gold!

    Love it! Love you!
    Amera♥


  • Arkbear gold member
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    WTF??

    Mmmm...a new Form I must try :)

     

    Very clever design Hun ~

     

    Graphic is intense...love it ~

     

    * drawings made simple with tip of wick lit, when eulogy whispered *

     

    Bravo!

     

    Good to read ya again Sissy ~

     

    Brother Bear ~


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    OUT STANDING

    I am always so lost for words when I read your work...You are the Queen of poetry my friend This had me on my toes...Tempers boiled in cauldron of cries tempered, portal opened, protected Spirit whimpered...


  • Bedroom Eyes
    August 30, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Well now...this was interesting...

    I've never heard of this type of form before, but the poem itself is well done

    I'll have to take your word that the form itself is proper

    I THOUGHT this was for a contest, but I don't SEE a contest link...I'll say good luck anyways though lol


  • HaleyMary
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Good write. Seemed to be strong emotion in this piece. I had to read it a few times. It made me think of having a wake for a person instead of a funeral. Sometimes I think it can be good to remember the time people were alive and the joy they brought others in their lives rather than mourn for all the experiences they never got to have.
    I don't think I've read a Terza Rima sonnet before. Seems like a challenge, but I think you did well with it.


  • penman gold member
    August 30, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Very well done. Oh my what a beautiful creation you have made precious. A fabulous use of the form. Best of luck in the challenge

1 - 16 of 16