I've never made a wish in time
when stars were falling out of sight
I only gazed upon it's beauty
strolling along my path at night
I know the Orion and Big Bear
but Draco I have not yet seen
I've never travelled celestial roads
terrestrial I have always been
I dream about the galaxy
the parallax, the anti matter
I dream of flying meteoroids
and what will happen when they scatter
Laying down in sandy dunes
where refractive sparkles light the sea
I know that all those constellations
drop their cosmic dust on me
Author notes
Well, that wasn't easy and I don't even know if it makes any sense, but at least I've tried.
I had to look up so many words, but even then it's difficult to use them in the right context. For instance: I know what they mean by parallax, but to put it in a sentence that actually makes sense in a language which is not my own, is quite another matter.
Therefor I kept it simple, so even I could understand what I was writing LOL
In a list
A contest entry
- Round one of four by Fire Opal, grannyeri, jess09stevenson, x Empathic Rose x, and IndividualEleven. by IndividualEleven.
800 points, ended September 8, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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sweet and outstanding, great lines and rhymes as well, like your use of the word bank, and how it makes you wonder what more is out there.
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short but good
It has a shortened length, yet intrigueing and well written. Descriptive, and has a romantic theme to it even tho it doesn't speak of a love story. You can visualize yourself seeing what you wrote, which is true talent. Good work. Good luck
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um wow! they get better and better. This is beautiful.
its easy to read and understand I love how you have said your are terrestrial to the roads and stars. suggesting that your allienated form everything you want and the wishes being too late becasue you have to watch the beauty first. well I saw tha beauty and caught the star in time to make this wish.
I WISH I hope you place in the top three becasue to me your poem was beautiful thankyou so very much for enetering
good luck -
This poem is fairly easy to read and understand; liked the flow and the rhythm and ryme in these lines. Thanks for entering this contest, adn good luck.
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