my eyes will never see you smile,
when i walk through my door,
my heart will never beat with yours,
it's laying on the floor,
our fingers will never lock again,
for you let my hand slip away,
and i can't say i love you,
though i think it every day,
my feet will never walk by yours,
no matter where they may go,
never again will i be able to kiss your lips,
or even share with you my soul,
i can no longer watch you sleep,
as we lay there in our bed,
or rest my palm against your cheek,
as we're gently touching heads,
yet i can live without those things,
but i'll never like it though,
because no matter how hard i try,
my heart will never let you go!!!
A contest entry
- does it hurt..... ? by DancingRain1692.
450 points, ended September 11, 2007, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Gone and Done With.....You. by Nostalgia.
550 points, ended September 7, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I'll Be Your Crying Shoulder ♥ Love ♥ by forbidden-colour.
530 points, ended September 22, 2007, 35 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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"as we lay there in our bed,
or rest my palm against your cheek,
as we're gently touching heads,"
Creates such a sad image in my head,
This is really beautiful
Thank you for entering.
x
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Simply beautiful.Yes this heart does not understand reality......
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Different style, I like it. Good job.
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sorry, but lamentation is not dark, or DP. It also isn't the type of light I am requesting. It is good, you have good style. I hope you enter one which is relavent to the contest.
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beautiful
saddening and touching and real and the rhyme scheme really adds a haunting lyrical quality to this piece...
-
perfect
i love it.... the meaning.... the power.... you loved but let go.....perfect

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Beautiful. Hint last line try 'won't' it will work better for you!! Kindest wishes my friend. Time will help to heal.


1 - 7 of 7







