The moon is
devil’s left eye
suspended
like an orange
above skylines of
smog-coloured
treetops.
Author notes
Hey, I’m telling it like it is. I can show you some photos of a lunar eclipse I found at deviantart, but nothing compares to lying spread-eagled on the driveway watching the moon turn freakishly orange.
In a list
A contest entry
- Yet Another PIF... 10p*15w by sunflowerpoet.
300 points, ended August 28, 2007, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Quickie Quest ~ Prewrite Party 2 by Namita.
300 points, ended October 6, 2007, 95 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Critical comments are most welcome.
Comments
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This is very evocative, giving an exact image of the subject matter, bringing back memories to anyone who has ever experienced one.
It reminds me of the last one we had here, though the moon didn't turn orange, was very much a deep red with parts fading to almost black. Beautiful, but it was winter so was a bit too cold to stay long outside to view.
Good write (sorry for the longish comment).
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This is extremely well done, the brevity really adds to the piece and the description is just amazing.
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Oh yeah. I loved this write. Very descriptive, excellent wording and flow. Perfect utilization of your 15 words limit! Thanks for entering, and good luck with the contest...
Hugz,
Sunflower.
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yes the moon
has many colors...I guess to ones eye the mind brings thoughts profound...still nature is awesome...so we see....I like what you wrote
Mal
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