Fluttering, like an open fan,
small and easily
crushed.
A heartbeat of wings
persevering determinedly
flits across the sky,
a black silhouette-
either fairy or moth
in the night
the onyx night
& I wonder- do you weep,
as we do, and if you do,
why is it you can fly?
"Nothing is more forgiving than darkness,"
they answer, swallowed by the lachrymal
indigo
sky.
So
as we often fly away
maybe it's safe for one to say
we aren't so different
and I think you'll find-
You are butterfly
as am I.
A contest entry
- PIF - Metaphor Mania!!! (Prompt) by Mad Moon.
600 points, ended September 8, 2007, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
so talented.
this is sweet,
but says a lot.
great work. -
Elsaa... I miss you're poems. Write me a personal book sometime. I miss you!! love, Hannah
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Oh my....this is Excellent! LOVE the ending line, my friend. Although, this poem in its entirety is outstanding! The language is wonderful, and the imagery stellar! Great work here! Thanks for your entry, and Good Luck!
-
This is pretty...its very dainty. Like every word seems to crushable like a tiny little puff mushroom =]. They seem to be mostly almost...beautified. Like the words flash long lashes and cheeks at you, yet they are sad. Like Geishas or something.
This whole poem was like, I don't know! The ending I really can't tell if its happy or sad. I like how the end bit rhymed, it really tied everything together. Mmmm the second verse-y thing was probably my favorite. Lots of billowy gloom words in there. && the beginning totally got me, so artistic. Excellent write, not sure if its lonely, hopeful, lovesick, or just simply describing a beautiful creature. Awesome.
o.0
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