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Autumn hurts...

Missing image

Just when the leaves are falling
the rain comes down
out of a dark sky
and clouds above my head
bringing the sadness back
And within the blink of my eyes
there is no difference
I can feel
between my tears
and the rain
wetting my face
me…
A storm starts to rage
around me…
rain lashes my skin
hurts my face
I can’t go on
not like this
not in this weather
So it’s time
to go home
into the warmth
of this safe place
my shelter
and wait…
Clear my sad thoughts
and try to pick up
the pieces
autumn has left me

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

I don't like the storms and the rain autumn brings....

In a list

A contest entry

Autumn storm and rain hurts...

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Comments

1 - 18 of 18

  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    September 21, 2008
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    wow nicely done - i really like this
    xoxo


  • wingsofgold25 silver member
    September 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I don't know where you live but I am sorry Autumn is such a hurt for you.
    But it takes nothing away from a beautiful written poem.
    Good Luck in the contest.
    ED.

  • Warrior7
    September 16, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Great poem you have written, it just goes to show how different the seasons are around the world because Autumn dosen't really bring rain here, brings loads of wind though.
    Anyway a sad piece Jeannette but you have written with heaps of emotion.


  • catz Moderators member
    September 16, 2008

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    I love Autumn, my favorite season but your poem goes to show how differently we can be in our feelings of the different seasons.

    A well written and nicely presented poem, even with the sad note to it... maybe especially because of the sadness.

    Good luck in the contest

    Dee


  • FifthDove
    September 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Ohhh how sad but very well written and displayed
    Best wishes


  • Huntress silver member
    September 15, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I like to go to the sunshine when the storms come keeps me happy good poem and good luck in the contest


  • J aime Coudre silver member
    September 14, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Very sad but hopeful also.


  • Nikki Rowles
    June 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    well...we are very different I just find something sexy about the rain...but it is a very good poem...thank you for entreing
    ~*~An Unwritten Truth~*~


  • Riftkin gold member
    September 10, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    like this poem so soft and wonderful
    flow and play on words
    just great here dear poet

    Riftkin


  • CitrineSunrise silver member
    September 9, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This was an interesting and very poignant look at seasonal mood disorder. The knowledge that the beautiful summer sunshine is past and the cold winter weather is approaching can be very despressing. You expressed that perfectly. Thank you for your entry and for your continued participation in the Titles Challenge Group. Peace, Liz


  • Vernal Bloom
    September 1, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Great Write!!!

    Wow!!!! I was really fascinated by your poem. A very good write. You have expressed yourself masterfully in a semi-narrative way. The images are wonderfully joined to each other. The last part was my favorite. The emotions are very strong and well expressed.
    I really enjoyed reading your poem and thanks for sharing with us.
    Would you mind reading one of my poems http://allpoetry.com/poem/show/3342726 (somehow it’s special for me) I would appreciate your comments.

    ~Vernal Bloom~


  • sunny day
    August 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Jeannette, Another look at autumn seen through the eyes of a free verse piece. You made this one flow like the rain coming down in that autumn storm and it was quite powerful. I think the storms in autumn seem a little more depressing than spring ones because we know that it won't be making any new buds pop open. And it just knocks more leaves down to be raked. LOL Thank you for sharing the beauty of an autumn storm with us and you have all my best wishes in the contest. Keep that ink flowing. Love and God bless you my friend, Joyce


  • Marctheman
    August 27, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    this is very nice, i lite the flow of the words, you di an excellent job writting this piece.


  • crystallynnbradford
    August 27, 2007

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    deep and quite the imagery....this was a very incredible piece, but I wouldn't expect anything less from such a talented poet.


  • JeannieD Hunter gold member
    August 27, 2007

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    My goodness this is an incredible write! Such deep and strong emotions you get across to the reader so well. Very impressive. I hate storms, but love to play in the rain. I am just a kid at heart lol.

    Jeannie

  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    August 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    AWE

    beautiful write sis.
    while you're cuddled up in your warm place with friends and pizza, think about the storms in a not so scary way....it is just natures way of crying with you and clearing the air for new beginnings

    Luv ya
    Tasha


  • Whispering Wind Moderators member
    August 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    BEAUTIFULLY SAD

    Your words touch me my sister cant tell where the tears and the rain begins or ends...go home to my safe place, my shelter and wait...sighs...you are best


  • SoMe
    August 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful!

    Wow.... (that's all I can say)

    This is beautiful, very captivating and just lovely. I hope the skies clear up and all you have to see soon is the bright sunshine and wide open skies. Chin up!

1 - 18 of 18