Us cannot exist without u
and neither can I.
Being apart is more than hard,
excruciating, I cannot lie.
Each day I push with hope
that I'm one day closer to you
but how I am to get there,
I have not even a clue.
Ideas and daydreams
flit through my mind.
Ways to get to you
and make you mine.
But dreams are for sleep
and not to be real,
so slowly onward I stumble
until your embrace I feel.
Author notes
I like this contest.
Dedicated to my love.
In a list
A contest entry
- Who Do You Love? (I WARN YOU... IT'S EXTREMELY CHALLENGING!) by Cherokee.
750 points, ended September 15, 2007, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - *** Untitled Contest *** by Hebz.
425 points, ended September 21, 2007, 74 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Write Challenge by Nicolette Everett.
450 points, ended November 25, 2007, 71 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Mhm
Us cannot exist without u
and neither can I.
Being apart is more than hard,
excruciating, I cannot lie.
Honestly It sound like life without someone at which you wish you could bare. Ye I know It hurts.
Great Job!
<3Rogue -
This is very nice poem on love. A very sweet way of showing someone your love for them.
Nice job! -
Wow, this is an amazing write. I love it. I can relate to it so much. There isn't one line I didn't love. I am actually going through the same thing, and it is so tough. Thanks for a great write, you are really good.
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"But dreams are for sleep
and not to be real,
so slowly onward I stumble
until your embrace I feel."
I liked that imagery that you slipped in there. I could see you (*cough* drunk) just moving on with life waiting for something to happen. Dont we all do that ... unless we've turned apathetic at some point.
Great write, babes
Never ♥
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"Ideas and daydreams
flit through my mind.
Ways to get to you
and make you mine."
That's what i do too, thinking & daydreaming...lol
didn't reach yet for the fourth stanza,lol
Great great piece & so emotional...I love it so much...
Thnx alot for entering & Best of luck
GloriousGift
Heba -
Everytime... :)
well worth the read. very good write i like it a lot. i agree with BeautifulSorrow . this piece was very well written. peace and take care.
Always too late...Always in our hearts...
~White
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Very nice.
Emotional and vivid. I really like this one and the rhyming. I wrote one with the same title recently. Funny huh? Great job Nick. I could really identify with this one. My son just shipped out for the Navy this month, seems you are going into the Marines? Hope everything works out for you and you can maybe write some inspired poetry about your experiences afterwards!
God Bless,
Annette
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Ummmm, no I'm not going into the marines.
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<3 Lucky girl
I love it Nick. Great job.
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I could feel all the love you have for this person. Wonderful imagery and emotions. Just beautiful. Amazing write and good luck in the contest
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man stay out of my head it seems like everytime you write something about love your thinking the same as me. But of course i loved it great job
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Thank you for entering...
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