1:42 a.m. she sits,
journal open on her lap
can't write can't think
and as chopin fades away, last etude on the record player
as the chirping of crickets takes over
her skin screams for release
and before the open window
she bares all,
her hips swaying slightly
in imitation of late-morning wind
she goes to the mirror
kneels to her reflection
and she writes
if not for the shedding of carnivorous silk
i certainly would become carrion
Author notes
Artwork: Nude in a Mirror by David Mott (ariosto)
In a list
A contest entry
- Nude In A Mirror ~ Image contest, art work as the prize by Ariosto II..
1000 points, ended September 9, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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O I loved this
I know the feeling of wanting to shed my skin again and again and again!
Smile,
Judy
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The piece is masterly crafted with striking images inserted here ans there.But the last stanza stands out.A fascinating piece in all.Ride on.
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OKAY.....................................
Nice visuals, but I have no clue what the write is supposed to mean.
POETDONTKNOWIT -
and she writes
if not for the shedding of carnivorous silk
i certainly would become carrion
(pondering this)
This is really creative and original
you set the scene up very well indeed
the last stanza to me is like the title of a surrealist painting, it makes you really wonder if your assumptions are correct.
good work!
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Interesting.
My first impression is of an emotionless void. Emotionally these words tell of someone who does not have the words to express what is being felt at the time. It is not awkward to read and as such I wouldn't change it. This piece works well with the title. The first line says just what she is doing. The last line is rather strange but works well with this. Good job. -
Wow! Glad I got to see the picture before they revoke it! Neat words but the way you summed it up was capital! Very good stuff here.
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I really liked what you did with this write. I found it very contemporary. Wonderfully penned
Peace and Love
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