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Black and White

Missing image

Black and White

I知 sitting here, in black and white
O how, I wear my inside out!
You were so near, within my sight
I sit and stare I want to shout

There was a theft the other day
I知 sitting here, in black and white
Since you left and went away
Confirmed in fear, it wasn稚 right

I shed a tear, this lonely night
And here I stay all torn apart
I知 sitting here, in black and white
I only pray within my heart

You left with her and here I stay
She took you dear, she stole my light
My life痴 a blur I知 in dismay
I知 sitting here, in black and white

Author notes

Rhyming Quatern with an internal rhyme

Quatern
A Quatern is a sixteen line French form composed of four quatrains. It has a refrain that is in a different place in each quatrain. The first line of stanza one is the second line of stanza two, third line of stanza three, and fourth line of stanza four. A quatern has eight syllables per line. It does not have to be iambic or follow a set rhyme
scheme.
S1 refrain is L1
S2 refrain is L2
S3 refrain is L3
S4 refrain is L4

Art work by: Scott Hutchison

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • BellaD
    January 14, 2008
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    Another great poem!

    What else can I say? A delightful read.


  • poeticweaver gold member
    September 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    You are amazing, but I think you may have a big head by now, lol.. I know I say that so much, but your verses are awesome. Thanks for sharing you....... Peace, Timothy aka poeticweaver~


    • Amera gold member
      September 17, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      Oh no not a big head! I love your comments and maybe it’s a gender thing but I love complements too. I also love chocolate, flowers and hugs.

  • TooRainbow silver member
    September 5, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Nice form and rhyme. I can really feel the pining of this woman. Great take on the painting. Good luck in the contest!
    Sheryl


  • Swan song gold member
    September 2, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    As always you are the master and I am on my knees worshipping you kissing your feet and chanting I am not worthy!


  • ellipsist
    August 29, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    nicely done...

    my dear... pretty abstract for you...


  • Pamela A Lamppa silver member
    August 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Superb quatern and I do love that internal rhyme as well. I truly love it when I read wonderful form like this. Punctuation could use a little work though to make it sound less forced, for example.

    I’m sitting here in black and white
    and Oh, I wear my inside out!
    Your heart was near, within my sight.
    I sit and stare in want to shout.

    Or something to that effect to blend it a bit and enhance that hopeless feeling that is conveyed. All in all a terrific take on the prompt and a wonderful Quatern. Thank you so much for such a splendid entry to my contest. Just wonderful. ~Pamela


    • Amera gold member
      August 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      humm... good idea! I'll fix it. Thanks


  • second-born
    August 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow...I love the flow of your poem while I'm reading it...the rhythm is so natural...it's like it has it own heartbeat...and oh it has internal rhyme which makes your poem more so beautiful...very lovely indeed...


  • Life is a Beach gold member
    August 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! You amaze me. I must try some of these forms of poetry. "Try", being the key word! You say this form does not have to rhyme and yet you did it perfectly and followed all the other rules as well. Amazing Amera! Pam


  • sunny day
    August 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    My words to you in black and white cannot describe in the least how I felt after reading this amazing quatern. I absolutely love how you included the internal rhyme scheme with it also. It didn't take away from the flow one bit. You captured the essence of this painting and created your own masterpiece from it. You know how much I love form poetry and this was sheer ecstasy to read. I haven't done a quatern in some time. Looking at this one I know I won't choose this form for the contest. I will try to come up with something else. Thank you for sharing again of your illustrious gift. Both you and the host never cease to amaze me with the way you are both poetry in motion. Best wishes with this entry that sounds golden, even if it is "Black and White". LOL Love you my friend, Joyce


  • And Hyetal
    August 26, 2007

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    I was thinking about entering this contest, but I had no inspiration...

     

    I love how you used the picture!  Everything just flowed, and I love how you used the theme "black and white".  How DO you do it?

     

    Always,

    Cassie


  • Silent Cougar Moderators member
    August 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    regadless of the point that the write itself is outstanding, your inclusion to pass on the meaning of the structure behind it is a sign of a genius at work. You always give more to the reader than some can imagine, and that is a bonus to anyone who takes time to read your work. simply an inspirational writer by far. well done.


  • PerVirtuous
    August 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is amazing. You are surpassing yourself with each and every work. I am so proud and impressed. This flows perfectly. When you have a collection of these, it is time to publish.


  • HaleyMary
    August 25, 2007

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    Powerful write. This piece makes me think of a person feeling invisible to someone in life who they care about and there also seemed to be a sense of heartbreak in this piece, as well near the end. Like, the sense that someone left a person alone in life. Best of luck in the contest.


  • Whoochi gold member
    August 25, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Oh this is excellent DOLLFACE! Of course, the form is dead on but the way you explain what happens to oneself is awesome...Funny, ironic am working on my page and chose only black and white....great minds think alike! Best of luck...


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    August 25, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Awesome. love the rhyme. Great work as usual.

1 - 17 of 17