She sat in pieces, darkness glooming; aching from descent.
As obtusely as it started, disregarded from intent.
Hollowed out, and opened up in through the grainy gaze she swam...
...of a milky white preponderance, staring blankly at "the man".
It's a feeling come and gone, and yet it still comes back again...
...to restrain this "shattered" feeling, in this darkened gloomy den.
In each corner, where he hides...puzzled pieces, all remains...
...just the swallowed, hardened feeling of regretful, bounding chains.
Was this rape, so sweet; endearing, volunteering, this descent?
...still regarded, as it was started with the first verse of Intent.
Still recycled in this headache in this darkened empty tomb...
...of where "the man" waits, puzzled pieces to invade this barren womb.
All he's taken, in the instance of a lustful, dragging act...
...forced upon you, legs pushed open...fighting, useless to react
Empty hallways, broken pieces to a world that once felt strong.
Now just darkened, blue depressions of what all, just went so wrong.
And still he lays there, in his corner with a smile fell all to pieces...
...ever watching every shadow, every eyelash still increases...
Scarred forever, waking fears of the "bumps" now heard outside...
...or the palate of destruction, in every alley he resides.
Puzzled pieces, in the corner...warmer, still "he" comes...
...and I wait, with every night fall...knowing truly he's not done.
Every shadow is a hand, and every heartbeat is "his" feet...
...and every maddening, deafening circle, resounds the quickness of retreat.
its just a memory. its just the past of a world I cant forget...
just more puzzle pieces shattered, in the darkness of regret.
Author notes
The picture reminded me of a broken woman....maybe due to some sort of physical or mental scarring by someone, anyone...possibly even herself. In my poem, though...it was under the hands of another man. And it was the loss of control due to the act that drew her into the hollow, depressing, shattered world she now lives in.
A contest entry
- Her Former Self by Pamela A Lamppa.
5000 points, ended September 9, 2007, 13 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Extremely moving!!
Rich in emotion. Good rhyme. It had a very real and personal feel to it. I agree with Blue and Pam about the author's notes. It speaks its point fully and beautifully. Thank you very much for the read. Good luck in the contest!
Sheryl
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This is an exceptional write, overflowing with strong emotion..it just pounds a steady beat from the page.
I agree with Pam, no need to make a notation for meaning of this...it speaks with its own voice loud and clear. Blue
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This is an amazing piece. You have run deep with this prompt and need no author's notes to make your point. Excellent rhyme and flow. Your meter is very very good and kept the beat moving right along.
Truly an impressive piece for this contest. A wonderful entry for this contest. Exactly the quality of poetry I am looking for. Truly, thank you for this gem. ~Pamela
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