~~~
bittersweet symphonies
in tuned strings of my guitar
I strum softly-
as trembling notes of
thunder scream overhead.
thousand running feet
across the hardened gravel
scattering my earnings-
as the coins r o l l away
under my tears.
no money-
and I stand here alone
under the pouring rain,
my umbrella
over my guitar,
and people stare-
laughing behind my back;
what a fool, they say.
but I know better.
music is my sanity
in this world of cacophony
the beauty in every
un-tuned obstacle I meet
and I sing
to the raindrop melodies
standing alone in these
empty streets.
~~~
A contest entry
- Musician in the Rain by vertigo beat.
475 points, ended August 26, 2007, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite me! ~~ One day only ~~ 500 points to Gold, will be judged tomorrow. by Naridill.
625 points, ended September 28, 2007, 145 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Did You Win a Trophy? by Nam.
1750 points, ended October 18, 2007, 41 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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Oh, this is superbly beautiful. Great poem! Congratulations on the gold.
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Excelent! You described so good the musician in the rain that I really thought I was there. Such a beautiful write.
Keep writing and congratulations on the awards!
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It appears I've already read this, but I did again - and I loved the gentle beauty this carries the way only you can... marvello...
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i would say that this was pretty interesting, i guess, but most certainly not what i was looking for. not only was it not what i was looking for, but you did not follow the rules that the contest indicated. thank you for your fantastic prewritten scribble & good luck somewhere else.
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I love music
this poem was a perfect show of a musician that never gives up on their love. I always enjoy street performers. they are filled with dedication and beauty. GReat poem and congrats on all of your trophies
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wow
at first i was like, well......hmmm...but the end is very good, thanx for entering -
I find the structure really odd,although the poem itself is around a basic concept. . .somehow there is rhyme but how I don't know.
The poem seems to associate rain with pain, and in an anti-climactical way it highlights lifes arduousness with percevearance and self confidence.
P.S God is in the Rain! -
I've read this a few times, trying to find something to point out, or say, and I just can't think of anything.
A great poem that you have written here.
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Wow!
Wow. this is such a beautiful poem. It's sad but it conjures a light feeling, such is the magnifigence! The dip and flow are like a gentle ocean, surging occasionaly, but never losing it's grace.Brilliant write; wow.
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your a gorgeous writer!
oh my dear...
how did I not comment on this.
soo pretty
"the beauty in every
un-tuned obstacle I meet"
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Oh wow... you got TWO trophies with this, ey? Well not that that is surprising... it is truly a beautiful piece. Bittersweet... like you said. You are a talented poet.
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You have a beautiful free verse here with these charming lines standing out:'music is my sanity/ in this world of cacophony' - the one reason music is refered to as an 'organised noise'.Who would miss the sanity an enthralling evergreen tune brings!
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Wow, that's so pretty...And sad, and thoughtful. Simply written, but it says a lot and you'r imagery is fantastic. Again, I really enjoyed this. I clicked your name randomly, and I'm glad I did.
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awesome piece
one of my favorite parts is
'music is my sanity,
in this world of cacophony'
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Congratts on your trophies, you have a true affinity to "rain" it shows, and it's beautiful. lol
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Simply beautiful, the waves of imagery hit home nicely. Very touching piece indeed.
Much luck
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A very deserving gold trophy winner!
Playing the guitar under the rain… making raindrop melodies,
and its outcome?
An expressive and colorful piece of poetry! I applaud you and even if I’m not the first to congratulate, still cheers to you!!
-Blanche
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Oh my darling - this is amazing! So well written, it screams for understanding. Excellent word choice and expression. Truly an amazing piece!
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wow!
This honestly blew me away. It was very sad yet hopeful. The person did not care about what other people thoght and knew music was his true calling.
yes! you followed Mrs. Seet's advice rite? The one on if you want to earn extra money, play the guitar. yup. Definitely a good thing to play the guitar.
very nice poem once again and congrats on the gold! YAY!
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Sorry, maybe I made it seem like spilling was a horrible word to use; I like the usage of spilling, just not twice . I think spilling sounds better than scattered. But it's your call, cause it's your creation.
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Stanza four: replace either "spill" or "spilling" with a synonym. You're the first one writing about how the Cello is being covered by the man, while he stands out. He's saving his art (and I think that's why I love that picture so much). The flow and diction was wonderful. Loved the poem.
I-Araxie-I
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CHARU!!!
HEY there buddy... this one was beeautifuuuul! It was so wow! lots of imagery... beautiful imagery!!!
music is my sanity
in this world of cacophony
Wonderful lines... Well, i'm basically speechless!!! This was another awesone piece... keep writing!
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