threads of me
removed from your sleeve
packed in stale boxes
left open to be examined
by a thousand eyes
and sold in a garage sale
I dread the moments
of 'remember when...'
memories become a wooden horse
unbalanced rocking
placed up in the attic
like an antique shop
collecting partials of dust
different snowflakes
oh, I've lost you
imagine the Eiffel Tower
mislaying nails
and important bolts
plummeting, reducing
and no longer existing
as it was
Author notes
invited by ea
it's about being forgotten by the ones that mean the most to you and then feeling like life is a little less then it was before because they are gone. that it was what I fear.
good luck judging the contest
In a list
A contest entry
- THE CHAIN by Dalaney.
475 points, ended September 1, 2007, 6 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Eiffel Tower by ea.
600 points, ended September 12, 2007, 9 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 19 of 19
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Hi, still loving this piece, darling. ♥ It looks so great in the book with that blue photo of the Eiffel Tower framed in a handy. It actually breaks my heart, as my son's girlfriend of six years went to Paris and ended up staying.
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oh I'm sorry to hear that
It's strange that this poem is reflective of that.
♥
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this is very beautiful.
it makes me feel. -
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thank you for the comment
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Yet another great peice...
Wow. I am really impressed with your work...
I loved the concept of this poem...
Keep it up!
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Kendal, this is the photo I want to use with your poem in the World Wonders collection I am putting together:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/8363432@N04/722380046/ so please let me know what you think and also send me your brief bio (2-3 lines) to include in the back of the book.
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"I dread the moments
of 'remember when...'
memories become a wooden horse
unbalanced rocking
placed up in the attic
like an antique shop
collecting partials of dust
different snowflakes
oh, I've lost you"
oh my gosh kendal... this is
SO breathtaking!
I really really relate.
you are such a brilliant writer! please never stop..
breaks are fine, just never ever quit.
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don't worry, I'll never stop. writing is my breathing... it's just coming out is smoke rings at the moment >.<
lots of love
<333
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I have missed reading your work Kendal. It's beautiful as always though. This has touched me more than you know. I've recently faced someone who has in such a short time forgotten what we meant to each other. It's horrible.
-xo- Brittny
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congratulations on you HM
A valid fear indeed, we all have lived this at one time or another. We explained .
Buddy
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this is an exceptional entry...
done very well, and with a tight
and creative style. Thank you
for entering my contest.
Love, Lane
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some great imagery in this piece hun,
and brilliant ending which linked it all together,
something so big then something so small
xxxx
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This is amazingly fantastic
I love all the ideas behind it, all of the dusy things at a car boot sale
And then something huge, like the Eiffel tower
Though it all seemed to fit together
That's how powerful your words are!
But seeing it in your words were so vivd and powerful
I saw so much images going through this, I got so much from it
I love the ideas of the things at the start being so amazing once to someone, but then being forgotten, and on them moving on they just crumble
Well done, I loved this, I felt it so much
I love you, oh so very much
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OOh I like it. good luck in the contest-paint
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thank you
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Well done
write on!
Good luck...
*PEACE*
8
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i really liked the mood of this poem. it made me feel left out. and the image of the attic was what stood out the most for me. i think it;s because it was such a descriptive stanza. i also thought the title of the poem was good for this piece. when you have this feeling of being forgotton and swipped out of one's life you always have this feeling like you're getting smaller and smaller and less important in the world. well i knoe one's thing for sure; your poetry won't be forgotton ever by me. you're one of the best poets that i have the pleasure of reading. lots of love,
!!autumn!!
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Whew! I'm impressed with this. It makes me so melancholy... threads of me... like hair on your sweater, bits of skin particles around the apartment waiting to be dusted away. threads is poignant because it could be internet threads that mean something to you, too and which do eventually go pooff! as well. The Eiffel tower stanza is purely genius. Everything falls away.
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What a sad world we live in many forgotten things are put in the attic of our minds and some are really precious and rare ...an excellent write
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