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show me

Touch my skin, and tell me if I am real;for I can not tell anymore.

Look into my eyes and tell me what you see,for I am my worst critic.

Take my hand and show me where we are going, for I have lost my way.

catch happiness on your tongue and show me what it taste like, so I will know it exist.

Breath into me and let me feel your existence,I want to know if you are real.

Share your pain and let me feel your sorrow,so I will know I am not alone.

Place your hand on my heart, and tell me if it is beating, for I am numb.

Invite me into your dreams,  So I will know what escape feels like.

Tell me your secrets, so I will know what it feels like to be trusted.

Believe in me,so I will have someone to believe in.

Be yourself, so I will know who you are.

Climb inside of my soul, so I will know what you feel like.

Show me what it feels like to be you, so I can feel someone other than myself.

 














 

Author notes

this is a work in progress (unfinished).....

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • Ender Tyberius
    September 8, 2007
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    The last 4 lines blew me away. You really catch a piece of humanity here. I'm amazed. Wow!


    • mysticallytamed
      September 8, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      :)

      thanks for this nice comment,I can't tell you how much I appreciate the fact that u take the time to read my writes,and how much it helps with my block! Every little bit helps!

  • Uniquely-Scarred gold member
    August 27, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    this is great writing so sensual and i feel for the poetess these lines are divine they mean the most to me in this great lil poem,


    yourself; so I will know who you are.

    Climb inside of my soul; so I will know what you feel like.

    Show me what it feels like to be you; so I can feel someone other than myself.




  • DevilHimself silver member
    August 26, 2007

    Edit | Reply

    holy schmeck! this GRIPS ME!

    WOW! this "ongoing" and "not quite finished" write rips into me and speaks volumes of you yet speaks volumes of me; as if it were my fingers frantically stabbing at the keyboard you have spoken words i could claim as my own- so well you have described the thoughts that sooo friggin relentlessly buzz through my head!!!! if you had "writers block" before, you no longer do because this is another example of truly golden expression! i would greatly like to see this completed if there are more lines to be added! i would like to tell you of a line i like but i feel them all so can only say i REALLY FRIGGIN DIG THIS! i kinda wonder how many people will read this and think "holy shit! those are my thoughts" !!! it seems to me that even though we feel so trod upon by tradgedy there still are many who would feel like the author of these words but sadly never spoke up and delivered the emotion as they should have... i am thinking it is a good thing that you were able to do what we/others fell short of doing! i love this and if there are more lines in you to add to it then please do!!!!
    -dev


    • mysticallytamed
      August 27, 2007
      Edit | Reply

      thnx

      I am going to add when I get the feel to do so. Thanks for the comment,I am sure their are plenty of people who can relate. Hopefully it can touch them in some way! thanks again!

  • mysticallytamed
    August 21, 2007
    Edit | Reply

    thnx

    It is a work in progress, I am just rambling inside,trying to get some of it out. Thnx for the comment!

  • NickN
    August 21, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    This is awesome. You give not only what you need but also the reasons why you need them, and all of them are just perfect. This piece is perfect.

    -Nick

1 - 7 of 7