Legacy Lost
© Copyright 2007 RMJ
It's hard to breathe-
bronchitis choking me to death;
no inhaler, no money, no hope...
So many thoughts racing
beyond comprehension.
Would this be that last day
I heard grandmother mention
the hour before her passing?
What's been done to show my worth?
How could I be dying
with so much left to complete?
Abrupt endings don't suit me well.
They frighten the how of things for me.
But there are days
when my wings sprout,
and take flight to unknown places
that seem to constitute liberty.
Maybe that's where I yearn to be;
away from pain that engulfs my spirit,
free and truly missed (by some).
A contest entry
- 100th Contest ....for my Favorites by MuddyKing.
10000 points, ended September 23, 2007, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Renee, you say so much with so few lines...one stood out to me and made me think for a bit
They frighten the how of things for me.
I love this line....it's not the knowing or not knowing that bothered you, but the how
I've never thought of how before...when I read this for the first time that stuck with me...and I looked at things with the how....it answered so many things that were unclear. But, reflection of a minute, a day, or even a lifetime, never really goes un-noticed
we are all legacy's in the waiting...that's what we poets do for money...lol
you always make me think
that's why you are here, along with the four letter word
love ya girl
peace and hugs
Muddy
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"Abrupt endings don't suit me well.
They frighten the how of things for me."
You've taken the words right out of my mouth, Renee - it isn't so much the "what" but the "how" - always. Or as someone once said "the biggest hurts come from the unexpected and the unexplained. I so loved your voice in this poem - soft and authentic.. addressing pain and difficult and wishes, but also flight and open skies. I can so identify with this poem...you wrote the thoughts of my heart here. Wonderful, wonderful poetry!
~ Nicolette
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"But there are days
when my wings sprout,
and take flight to unknown places
that seem to constitute liberty."
I have never seen a day that you were without your wings, Dear Heart. Maybe you just couldn't see 'em. Much like the movie, "It's a Wonderful Life", we touch so many lives, unaware. If you go on ahead of me, I wouldn't miss ya too much for too long though...'Cause I know, if I don't see ya here, I'll see ya there...where pain is non-existent & beauty reigns supreme. Ahhh, Renee...Life is far too brief as it is...If you ask someone who's 100 years old, they'll tell ya, "It was gone in the blink of an eye." Beautifully done, my Sister. Good luck in Richard's contest, Sweetie. Wanda
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oh...wow, that last lien packed a whop..... really radiant writing, my friend...
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I have a feeling your spirit is constantly aloft even when your feet are planted firmly on the ground. The last stanza really makes one stop and think...
You would be missed by many I know. Good luck in the contest.
Sincerely,
Leo Long -
I like this a lot Renee!
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Let your inner soul fly as I do at night. The pain from the disease I suffer daily allows me to be carried away at times, I too wonder will I be missed? Will anyone care...Our hearts soar as poets that is our legacy, were are not rich in worldy possessions, but in our heart we are. Warmth and compassion for others, we make people smile and cry. Anger or hurt when they read our mere words. Overall, a sense of pride dwells deep inside of all of us...and hope.
Great penning, wonderful poem I have been away from AP far too long. ~Sie
Sorry I babbled too long.
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Your babble is my soul's recompense. Thank you for the beautiful comment. I pray you recover from being ill. I understand that it takes it's toll. I wish you a speedy recovery, and many years of good health. You were missed.
Much Love & Many Blessings ♥
Renee
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