as i slept i saw my life in symbol
a perfect angel all dressed in white and gold
sat on a cloud that few had ever seen
then in a moment she changed
gold turned silver
what was white
now black
wings of dove turned to bat
slowly she fell
and as she fell she grew
until she reached the bottom
hell
as a woman she took the devils hand
and danced among the flames
others of gold wept for her
yet she was headless to their tears
i woke and found that her face was mine
tears burned my eyes and then he touched me
and once again i danced
heat, sheets, love, pain, sex,
these brought the change.
Author notes
please read the sequel "dreams on wings"
A contest entry
- "What You Love" by FallenAngel09.
300 points, ended October 4, 2007, 13 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Whatever by Earthmagick.
480 points, ended October 20, 2007, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - 14 to 18 ages enter your best prewrite Judged by RedwingSpirit.
700 points, ended January 7, 2008, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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Thank you for entering this into my contest I wish you the best of luck
RedwingSpirit
congrats on the gold -
Beautiful
This is very well written. There is an amazing amount of beauty and truth in your words. I love the flow and the story in the background.
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This was great. I love flow and this flowed perfectly. Without morphing your story at all. And the rhyme was so off that I didn't get bored at all but it really pulled the piece together. Anyway great job. Thanx for entering ~ Aurora
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I enjoyed thispiece a great deal
thanks so much for sharing. It was beautiful, great flow of words and emotion.
Tory
best of luck to you -
that was pretty wicked. i like it.
wow.
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sorry I forgot to tell you to put why you chose your form in the author's comments, it is one of the rules, please change and get back to me.
Your Host,
Tiphanie -
omFG!!!
i love it.
im not just saying that.
everything about this poem is just amazing and refreshing...
this has to be one of my all time favorite poems now. :]]
wow, keep up the great work!!!!
~~krystal
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Thanks for your entry into my contest, your talent and hard work are very much appreciated. I have to say that I loved this piece, the ominous feel of it intrigued me without it being overly dramatic, beating the meaning over my head with a bat. I thought the twist in the middle was well worked in and added to the ominous feel of it. Dancing with the devil is a beautifully tragic thought that had me enthralled. A great sense of foreboding and I commend the write for that. Great job and good luck in the contest.
Your Host,
Tiphanie
There was a little spelling error, but nothing to be too alarmed about. You misspelled angel. Instead of angel you put angle. You can fix it at your own discretion.
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