She stands alone in a room of mirrors
She is emptiness, dancing alone
With pointed toes scruching under her fragile frame
And fingertips numbed to the right position
She falls
Crumpling and convulsing
She is ruffles and heartbreak
The embodiment of shame and misery
She lays alone in a room of mirrors
And as they crash down
She stands to begin her dance again
Author notes
I don't have a site, I don't know why you need that...and my favourite rule is number 4, I guess.
A contest entry
- more points coming as i get them by katie-jo.
550 points, ended August 18, 2007, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - EMPTINESS DANCING by maa.
543 points, ended August 20, 2007, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Just about anything that is good by star girl.
450 points, ended August 22, 2007, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-write Party ~ Closes In One Day by Namita.
300 points, ended October 1, 2007, 90 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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you are a good writer.
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I love the imagery in this one too. great form and style a sad dance great emotions pulled togather the read great job
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This is delicious in the clarity of the image and provoking in the metaphor created. Becoming is such an adventure as we all feel we must fall apart an be humpty dumpties before we find out we never were broken in the first place. Wonderful poem.
Love, Tom B.
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Love this, the brevity and messages. Thank you. Good luck.
Luv,
Candy
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The opening image is haunting, and strongly supported by other images throughout: "ruffles and heartbreak."
And it triggered some interesting thoughts in my own poem. Thanks for the option in the contest. -
GOOD
now I really like that one and the last line hehe -
good work.sounds good,but hard to explain how i like this poem.anyways nice job.keep up the good work.
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This poem could use a little descriptive note in the authors box, sound good, but still somewhat unexplained, I've done a few like this myself, also you need to read the rules, I need your site name and favorite rule in the authors box or i'll have to DQ, Good luck.
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a very unique interpretation of the prompt, wrapped in colorful and lively imagery and metaphor ... I am sure that the heroine of your poem will dance in a more authentic way now, that the mirrors are gone ...
thank you so much for your participation in this contest,
maa
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Sad and eerie. Great poem.
Thanks for entering and best of luck in the contest.
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