maybe

I am no longer the object of your thuoghts
there have been days of your despiration
and days of your abandonment
complexity hindering me from acceptance
as if we are both staring into opposite sides of the sun
blinding our eyes together
and stupidly trying to imagine what is going on
each moment wandering more and more
pretending fate, betryal, corruption
although no one has done wrong
we picture it.
tourcher our cells, rattle our brains...
in unlikely possiblities
we blinded truth, and strangled forgiveness
we feel we need to see each other
as bad people
because if we didn't,
we would lose our egos
fall into a confused and lonely state
whoever created abusive relationships
never fully wanted to admit they were abused
and maybe it wasn't just them being abused
maybe they needed to find distruction.
maybe.