Everyday I become more hollow.
I'm so pressured and weak.
Can somebody help me?
I realized I am something I can not be.
Each time I reach for love,
It goes away.
At the sight of you,
My heart begins to hate.
I have flirted with suicide.
In hopes it might dull the pain.
Feeling like I have no release.
It's the same old game.
Something takes a hold of me.
It reminds me of how you're so fake.
If you need something real to hold onto
You can have my absence in faith.
Please give me salvation.
For at this moment I'm all wicked.
You make me dead inside.
How sublime... yet so inflicted.
Give me something safe.
Something like suicide that never fades.
Just say it to my face-
Tell me I'm your favorite disgrace.
Apart of me is no longer near.
I can't help but hate you.
Love is gone with my trust you once had.
So what the fuck is with you?
Detach this pain.
My heart is constantly hating with each beat.
Come step inside...
Who wants to see-the death of me?
In a list
A contest entry
- ( ! A N Y T H I N G ! )*~*~PRE-WRITES are OK ... 203;203;203;203;203;203;​​R by xxlisajazminexx.
425 points, ended October 9, 2007, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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i have been there before....
a few people in my life have made me feel that way... made me not want to live and just hate the thought of love....with love there is always pain ....
i'm still here taking my anger and hurt out in my poetry.... and still moving ahead...
great poem... i think we all can relate ...
YOU ARE MOST DEFINATELY IN MY FINALIST LIST NOW!!!!!
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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ENTERING THIS WONDERFUL PIECE INTO MY CONTEST!!!!!!!-----
WISHING YOU MUCH LOVE----
AND GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
XxLisaJazminexX
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I can relate to this, especially my younger years. As for the parts referring to suicide (and this is going to sound rich, coming from me), the best revenge, the best way you can fuck with, pardon my French, with someone who makes us feel this way is staying alive, as difficult and painful as it may be. Nothing annoys nor messes with the minds of our detractors more than not only surviving what they throw at us, but being better for it.
Simply because most of the time, these people don't have the capacity to do it themselves. When jealousy takes a hold of them you can hold your head high in satisfaction, not only in being a better person, but also in the fact that your revenge on them is complete.
Sorry for the long post, good write.
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Dark and Deeply Emotional
Deep and emotional and very very powerful indeed. Full of raw emotion here. There is also anger within this piece too. I love this writing as this is quite dark. Keep it up
All the best
Wayne
x
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This is a very emotional write, a sort of cry of hatred towards someone:
Something takes a hold of me.
It reminds me of how you're so fake.
If you need something real to hold onto
You can have my absence in faith.
In this part, it kind of makes me feel as though your talking to God, enjoyed reading this, its very good!
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This is really awesome. I love it! I liked the line:
I have flirted with suicide.
The whole poem was awesome. It's angry and hateful and has a hint of deep disgust towards this person. I like it a lot. Great piece!!!
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why u so angry? lol
this was a well written write my friend - I enjoyed it (albeit filled with hatred and anger)
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a twin indeed we both are
so amazing astoundingly written
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That's the truth! You're fabulous!
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i really got this poem...its soo good...it also pointed a few things out to me which i thank you for...you really have a way with words...keep writing.
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