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You are a soul

 .

 .

 .

 .

You don't have a soul

You are a soul

You have a body

That inhales my serene insanity

Taking the peaceful force from within me

Creating the natural act of life 

 .

You are a soul

You have a body

Yet

Why do you breathe my life with your mouth?

.

.

.

.

Author notes

phrase prompt=
You don't have a soul
You are a soul
You have a body

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • penman gold member
    December 31, 2007
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    Excellent

    Very insightful and spiritual. Congratulations on your honorable mention.


  • Darkened Seraph
    September 8, 2007

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    this is a interesting write with this prompt and i like it, you have made a interesting point here i like how you described the first stanza and how it inhales your insanity, a brilliant idea here and well worth the shiny HM it got well done


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar silver member
    August 16, 2007

    Edit | Reply


    You are a soul

    You have a body

    Yet

    Why do you breathe my life with your mouth?

    Indeed there is an intriguing querry made here..I love it..thanks for the wonderful concept with in this entry my friend..well done..


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    August 15, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    Nice easy reading that makes ya think. good.


  • Silent Cougar Moderators member
    August 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    now some readers will reply with a comment talking about the devil within you, satan, dragging the life out of you, they may see that and that is there vision.

    But what do I see?

    I see the image of a young girl, lying in the final moments of her existance, struggling to keep hold of her place amongst us. The 'you' you talk about, is a lifegiver, someone who is drawing from you the last point of no return into your serene insanity/peaceful force 'death', and in return, is giving with each new breath, the natural act to live, as he breaths live back into your soul from his. breathing your life with his lips, Mouth to mouth resuscitation.



  • Naridill
    August 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Simple, yet philosophical. The answers which pershue more questions. I like it alot. Was a beautiful intake on the prompt provided and ended as strongly as it started.


  • x-Black-Butterfly-x gold member
    August 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    an awsome write you took the prompt and made it something beautiful in so very few words and lines
    i like the thoughts portrayed in this
    well done and best of luck

1 - 7 of 7