She is the dizzy, petulant girl
who thinks she won’t get caught.
Sitting astride bucking beaus,
riding for all she’s worth,
and what does it matter if nature insists
her time to be mother has come.
She can pay for a pill, or better still
an abortion that won’t spoil her fun.
She is the frightened, obedient girl
who prays she won’t get caught.
Hugging a teddy, afraid of the dark,
‘cos someone creeps to her bed,
and what does it matter if nature insists
her time to be mother has come.
She’ll carry stigmata of brother whose father
unless an abortion can be done.
She is the raped, beaten girl
who was unlucky enough to get caught.
Silently rocking, silently sobbing,
re-living her ordeal each day,
and what does it matter if nature insists
her time to be mother has come.
In her womb is a seed, a rapist’s creed,
that she can always give away.
She is the desperate, childless girl
who is lucky to conceive one day.
In her husband’s joy, she basks in glory,
unaware of the danger she holds,
and she is happy that nature insists
her time to be mother has come,
but her doctor warned, if this child is born,
both she and baby are dead.
We are the judges, kangaroo courts
who deliver a verdict to all.
Perhaps we should cease being conscience police,
leave emotions at the door,
and just because nature insists
a time to be mother has come.
Doesn’t always mean, a child should be seen,
Pro-life, pro-choice, how about pro-common-sense.
Author notes
"This is my opinion and I have the right to write it"
Ok, not my best but it gives my opinion on the stupid arguement going on between Pro-life & Pro-choice. Perhaps we should all just stop our emotions getting in the way of common sense. Abortion as birth control is totally wrong .. no matter how you look at it, Abortion for an abused girl, or a raped woman or where the mothers or childs life is in danger is totally right ... no matter how you look at it.
Don't give me the Adoption option .. think about it would you want to carry the child of your brother or father or rapist around with you .. get real.
Oh and don't even bother to respond with some religious rubbish either .. I am totally anti-religion, I have my own way of faith and I don't need no book or preacher telling me otherwise.
A contest entry
- Defend Your Right To Pen The Truth by Cannonsfire.
1750 points, ended August 20, 2007, 10 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abortion. by DAMSELx.
450 points, ended June 15, 2008, 38 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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EXTREMELY strong piece. You confronted this issue in a way that I have yet to see in all of the poems or writes on abortion that I have read. I'm afraid I don't have much else to say that won't repeat what is said in comments others have left, but I would like to say thank you for this. This is a piece that I believe everyone should read.
Good luck in my contest,
--DAMSELx
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Dear Poet, this is one of the best pieces of poetry I have read re abortion. It doesn't preach it tries to reach, it doesn't lecture but opens up conjecture. The imagery within each stanza/scenario/situation was very effective at evoking emotion. I did not find Kangaroo Court cliche, it was pertinent and powerful at placing the reader in the same situation as judge and jury. I was surprized by the reaction of the poetess who suggested that as a male you have not nailed a female perspective, I respectfully disagree, you spoke for all females and if this poem was posted under a predominantly female name there would be no indication that the writer was male. This isn't a write against women or one that doesn't understand women and children, on the contrary, it explores and exposes the raw reality of circumstances. I echo your thoughts entirely, whilst we all have our own opinions if we force our opinions onto others, ie via religiious threads or legislation, the circumstances won't go away. On a different tangent, I should like to see the time reduced for abortion, the government just voted to keep it at 24 weeks, it also voted for experiments on human embryo's to be cultured with animal cells, a Doctor Frankenstein science and of great concern. Also of concern is the fact that some vaccines are cultured from aborted foetuses and then used as vaccines for our children, as is the fact that there is a company which buys the placentas from both newborns and aborted foetuses to use within their skincare products and they market them as having natural ingrediants. Forgive my rambling, Bravo.
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I'm glad someone has the sense to see that common sense is the right way.
This has and always will be an issue that raises emotions in both camps, personally I feel each case should be looked at individually with the mother-to-be (and the father if possible) involved in the process. I really can't see how it is right for a raped woman or child to be forced into giving birth to a child, but on the other hand neither should abortion be just another birth control option.
On your other points, I feel that the legal time for abortion should be another issue that is decided for individual cases, an abused person may not have the chance to say anything until after that time has passed. As to using still born and aborted foetuses for skin care products that is just so very wrong (as is any use of animal products in cosmetics).
Science will always move forward, using various methods to achieve their aims .. whether we agree with them or not. Human nature I'm afraid.
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You list options.
You do list options and for those cases where sex is forced on a woman there should be available medical care. The irresponsible young woman who just wants to screw around should be taking birth control. There are those who the doctors claim they should not have the baby. Since you do not want to hear anything about religion let me say this, a little morality goes a long way. When it is someone else's choice and not the woman how can one say that is common sense? -
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religion causes to many problems in the world today as it is, I'm sick to death of hearing so called pious people preaching to others about how they should live their lifes. The choice should remain with the individual .. who else makes the choice for them.. the only ones who do that are the relgious zealots who want to control other peoples lifes. I have no problem with morality, but why does it have to be associated with religion.
Confine religion to the churches, don't preach it to those who don't want it.
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I think this is a fantastic approach to such a difficult subject and I agree with your 'common-sense' proposal; many people who campaign publicly against abortion seem to see things as seperated into 'right' or 'wrong', with abortion always being the latter, without considering the fact that each case has it's own circumstances.
I know someone was unsure of the matter-of-fact approach to each situation in the poem, but I thought it worked well, and you still recognise the seperate emotions in each. I don't think it matters if people can tell this is a male voice (though I personally don't think that it shows here, and certainly does not mean you cannot have any personal experience of the subject), it is equally as valid as a woman's. I liked the way you presented each scenario, particularly the contemptuous tone of the first stanza; it conveys your personal feelings without stating them outright.
Congratulations on the bronze prize, it was well deserved
Rosie x
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Thank you for your comment. Items like this are always going to produce arguements mainly because of emotional feelings, but I think more people should ponder the subject on a more practical base, nobody I know would take a life willingly .. but their thoughts are similar to mine when it comes to abortion, we should never tar everyone with the same brush after all we are all individuals.
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Ah well. I chose this one, because of the title and the nature of the content. I know what it is to be several of this women, consequetively.
You have some interesting phrasing here. And I like that you stepped forward to take a firm stand. I'm pro-life myself though. Pro-common sense, leaves too much room for one's personal beliefs to color perception. Too much room for biased error. But that's just phyisophical mutterings.
On the flip side, the situations also feel a little '2-D', if you know what I mean. I don't think that that's your fault really, because your a male writing about a deeply female subject.
In this case, I might advise you to switch to imagery instead, in each stanza, and allow the angle of your focus to elaborate on your feelings of the issue.
It would also be less likely to show you as a male writing this, and more as a 'human' writing this.
Also, watch out for cliches like 'kangaroo court', that were not metaphors of your own making. -
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Thanks for your honesty, the poem is meant to be a little "in your face", I was more focused on getting the message across than producing a image piece. Yes I am a male writing about a mainly female subject, but that doesn't mean men don't "feel" .. I stand by my conviction that Common-sense in this issue far outways the emotional.
I know "kangaroo court" is very, very cliche .. but I love that metaphor and just had to include it.
Respect & Regards -
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I never implied that men don't feel. However, on such a personal and particularly 'female' subject, your common sense approach is much akin to me writing a paper on the feel of an erection growing and how it feels inside a female.
I could speculate what it feels like to you, however, it would be trite of me to speak with any tone of solid logical hands on (excuse the pun) knowledge of the experience.
That would be my real point. And the reason that I stated that imagery and allowing openness of your personal feelings, might be more effective here.
You sound preachy and short sighted, because you have no way of knowing what the actual experiences feel like. I was attempting to offer a way around that, that still allows you to express your personal opinions on the subject.
But in the end, it is of course, always your choice to do what ever pleases you. It was merely outside thought. -
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Hey hold on I wasn't in any way attacking your comment or your feelings, lets not let this fall into a war .. it is a very confrentational subject and we all have our opinions on it.
I have no wish to fall out with you I admire your comments and your talent too much, to do that.
Lets just leave it there please
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this is a hard subject speak on ,
its very emotional
and one should not speak in con when they have
have not walked in those footsteps .
wonderfuly written poem .
ive no points or i would appalud but i give you my thoughts -
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Your thoughts are worth more than any number of applauds, thank you for taking the time to read my poem.
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Not your best? Seems all of we who felt we'd left our best at the door, did quite well. All I really mean is, if this isn't your best ... I'm off to look for it, favourtise you and be happy for the encounter
Each vignette stood well by itself and within the whole so a worthy trophy for this well-wrung work
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Thank you for honoring me by adding me as one of your favorites.
I felt this wasn't one of my best not so much for the contents but for the flow, it lost its rhythm in some places and when I can get round to it I shall probably revise this.
Regards -
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Heh. I know the feeling. The again, if we didn't strive to find our best, we would never improve eh?
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How true
"A poem is never completed, only abandoned"
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EXACTLY
Every person has the right to make decisions in their lives. Every person carries the weight of their own circumstances. Even could we bear the burden for someone else, still does not give us the right to judge. People are different, situations are different. The problem is cookie cutter laws and opinions, trying to squeeze people into boxes and make them fit. Each person's life dictates whats best for them. Not the law, not the church, not other people. Sometimes its better if we just mind our own business.... Well done and well written, the repetition made this stronger and made the message more focused and clear. Great job and wonderful piece.
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Thank you my friend for your comments .. I stil lthink this needs tightening up a bit, but I am content to leave it as-is for the contest and then play with it after.
"The problem is cookie cutter laws and opinions, trying to squeeze people into boxes and make them fit."
Aint that the truth
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This is a very powerful and eloquently penned opinion that would cause debate but in saying that, I wholeheartedly agree with you having the right to put it in your words. So well done here and exactly what I asked for, the truth as the author sees it. One slight point, first stanza I think 'beaus' should be 'beau's' Love, C
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Not sure about that spelling and the poem doesn't really flow how I wanted it to .. I may edit after the contest and try to get the rhythm better than it is.
BBH
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love it
absolutely right to express your opinion and you do it soo eloquently an argument either way is very justifiable.. and an obvious wonderful controversial subject to write about...great write..
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A womans body is her own domain and she is the only one who can decide what is best for herself, regardless of the circumstances. We shout about equality and then dare to stand atop another and judge them for being different. We are each an individual, with individual thoughts, feelings and emotions. One person can't dictate to another how their life should be lived. If it isn't abortion it's religion, racism...anything they can get their teeth into, people don't really care about the topic, just the adrenalin of debate itself.
We cry and accuse people of interfering...yet we force our opinions on others and expect them to agree. It's about time that people learned that their own life is their business...yet the actions of another are of none of their concern.
Individuals make up society, yet blame it for every mishap. People need to stop looking around them to find "problems" in others - the problems lie inside the very people who cast the first stones.
Hmmm...Sorry my opinion used nearly your whole page
This is an excellent penning that I hope many will read and take onboard. Thankyou for sharing. Laura x
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My sentiments exactly sis and you opinion can take up as much room as you want because it is a valid one.
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